Me and my husband have been married for over 5 years. He used to bring home cards abs flowers at random, send me songs dedicated to me, come home and scoop me up and kiss me like I meant the world. He would text or call when he could, the perfect husband as far as paying me attention anyways. Now he does none of this. I've barely seen him because he's been busy at work and this past weekend he finally got days off. He spent most of his time away from me. I've told him before it bothers me and I would just really appreciate occasionally getting some attention or a note, anything, just at random because he cars out he's thinking about me, but since I've brought it up (over 6 months ago)... NOTHING. I would even love for him to just take me out... fast food anything! How do I make him see he's losing me before it's too late. I really do love him, but he's nowhere near who I married!
Most Helpful Guy
Women are from earth. Men are from earth. Anyone who says otherwise is trying to manipulate you into sucking out your husband's soul and destroying your family.
Your husband shares his resources and his space with you. That means he loves you. The other things we share with women we love are time and experiences, and this is where you are having difficulties. If you order him to spend more time with him or punish him for failing to do so (as ALL of those chick books will tell you to do) he will (rightly) feel like you don't appreciate him for working.
I strongly suspect that 18 hr days of pool installation wasn't exactly how he always wanted to spend his life, and that he does this to give your kids a good upbringing and try to have something left for you not to be broke after he dies. Maybe not, but that's most guys I know.
A man will go where he is needed. Let him know what you need him for at home. He (i'm speculating here, but not without reason) wants to be the head of your family, and feels he has earned that. Haven't you earned the right to follow his lead, and to feel secure in the knowledge that he holds himself responsible for your family? Don't you need him at home to father your children and chart out your lives together?
Let him know he is needed at home. Leave it to him to decide if he's worked too much or been away from home too much. When he sees that you need him, you will win him over without having to argue about it.1