Would it be fair to decline a marriage proposal if the man were to propose suddenly after the woman breaks up?

I was answering a post about a woman concerned about her bf not proposing and thinking marriage is a piece of paper.

My advice was to leave as there is no point if two people aren't on the same page nor compatible in future goals, what commitment is to them, etc.

Someone else says that unless the guy were to then coming back running and apologizing, to walk away but even if that happened, I wouldn't be happy about it and would actually say no to that. I wouldn't be happy about getting a marriage proposal if I to break up and know very well he would have probably never done it out of his own will.

This is the link and my sn is Dragonfly. Do you think I'm being harsh in my stand on this?

  • Yes, I wouldn't accept that (I don't like the idea that I had to force it)
    Vote A
  • No, maybe people can change and I'll forgive and accept it
    Vote B
  • Other
    Vote C
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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Apparently, the male poster didn't reply to my last post. I guess he thought I was harsh. But honestly, if I were one of those woman waiting endlessly for that proposal and had to then break up... and then he keeps knocking on my door not only will be answer be NO by then but I would report him.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I think it doesn't make a difference. In the end she was going to get what she wanted, and that was a piece of paper that really doesn't mean anything. I believe in a committed relationship. I don't believe in marriage in the modern day. It is far too easy to get a divorce, and there isn't even a stigma attached to it. That doesn't mean I don't value the idea of what marriage is suppose to be. Currently society, and the law, has drained the value out of marriage. The only thing that happens when you get married is you pay higher taxes. There is no real commitment to marriage like there should be. I think that is the problem a lot of people are having with the concept of marriage.

    • This is what I see marriage as (even for me marriage isn't my main goal in life and frankly can go without it):

      I think it's too much of a won for me nor any women that would like another lifestyle besides going back to being the traditional housewife for a while, in which she then has to quite her career for several years until she's ready to go back to work. This would mean that all those years wasted in college, studying and working hard to get somewhere in life were wasted.

    • Show All
    • Today we still see this inherited mindset at work. Men want sex with no commitments, and the woman wants a relationship, but gets used for sex. There are some exceptions, but for the most part, men and women simply desire different things from a partner.

    • True. It makes sense why a woman is more likely to want marriage because if she wants kids, even just being in a relationship wouldn't be too beneficial for her. Guess in the end, it's all about finding your interest and what's better for you.
      A guy can find a woman not too much into marriage but they're usually childfree (out of choice) woman in the late 20's or 30's like myself, which aren't many. But yes, we do exist.

What Girls Said 1

  • i agree with you. ultimatums/breakups don't seem like a solid foundation for a marriage.

    • True. I can't even imagine what woman would be happy about being engaged in that manner, esp if someone were to then want to hear the story of how they got married... what exactly would she then be telling them?

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