Why am I not satisfied with it?

He said that we are only friends, but we had in some occasions some kind of intimate encounters. I think that if that continues, we will be fwb. I don't like this idea.

I would rather prefer to be only a friend instead. However, I feel rather sad with that idea.

The problem is that if the opportunity comes, we will have another encounters, probably leading to a real sexual intercourse. Of course, I would want to give my everything to him, but I fear that he will only see it as only sex and pleasure, thus degrading our friendship relationship and that he would want to see me or contact me less.

And I fear that if I tell him my worries, he will only hear them and only accept what I propose as he frequently does. What can I do? Why am I not satisfied with being either a friend or a fwb?


Most Helpful Guy

  • A successful friends with benefits relationship requires a multitude of things, one of the most important being, you both need to want the same thing; sex with no emotional attachments. You would do your situation no justice by pursuing such a relationship. This route would obviously end in disaster and your relationship, as lovers and friends, in pieces.

    After having said that I think you know the answer to your problem. Unless he wants a committed relationship with you the only sensible thing to do is remain friends.

    MY opinion, not yours.



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What Girls Said 2

  • Youre not satisfied with FWB because its just not the type of person you are. You have feelings for him and its damn near impossible to quell those to just be friends. Some people can manage the whole "Friends with benefits" deal. Some people really cant. DO NOT sleep with him. If he can't commit to you now, why would you think he would after? He gets to have everything a relationship offers without any accountablity with you if you do Have the talk with him. Ask him where the pair of you are headed to. Don't mention your thoughts until he answers so he doesn't have the option of just conceding with your opinion.

  • This is sad (and totally understandable). You want more with him, but he doesn't seem to feel the same. (Always painful to accept.) You are right to worry that a friends with benefits situation will only hurt you. If he actually does care about you, he will respect your friendship enough not to toy with your emotions through sex. And don't kid yourself, it will be even harder on you emotionally once you add the emotions of having sex. If he doesn't see you as more than a friend, sex won't change that for him, and it won't make him love you. Respect yourself enough to demand more of a man...you are worth having a man who loves you. And no, being friends doesn't feel good either if you have feelings for him. Only you can decide if the pain of that is worth it or not.