I'm a christian and i'm looking for a same minded and same spirited girl. Atheists will probably mock or completely be unable to relate to this but in my experience there is a huge difference, and a person who is not with the grace of God is pretty often bad news. Many women approached me but i had to reject them because they had nothing to do with spirituality and sooner or later that would show up, and their true colours would be revealed. and thanks God i can discern pretty clearely things won't go good for me if i marry those people. How do i reject these girls kindly and what should i use as an excuse? should i be straightforward and honest and explain to them my paradigm or come up with a "kind lie"? i know some secular girls think they can be good anyway, and some truly are, but they are far fewer than they think they are. and good is objective. you might think you are good for yourself or for some people. i'm looking for someone who cares to be good for God's standards, and for His shake. but at the same time i dont want to make them feel bad if i'm not going to benefit them spiritually. but i can't afford to be the one takes all the weight of their transition on his shoulders either. i tried with a girl once who showed some signs that she is willing to get in that path, but it was too much energy and effort wasted from my side. too much spiritual cost and burdain too (her past demons waged a huge war on me (for those that understand from these things, the seculars can mock all they want)), and the girl finally dwelled in her old life again unfortunately. she had a very hard time repenting and changing life, so her passions got the best out of her. so i'm looking for a person who is in that path for years and is a passionate and vivid struggler in Christ. but i also have some secular friends and i still have to deal with such people in my life, mainly because of my job, thus these girls who approach me and other times are sent to me by friends etc.
Most Helpful Girl
People who aren't Christians aren't automatically bad people. I'm very spiritual but I have no religious beliefs, and I live my life making good choices and behaving in a kind and respectful manner, and I've found it's people like yourself, who have such rigid judgmental beliefs and attitudes who are worse for society. If you want to narrow your options by assuming the worst of people or being biased, you do that, but you're just as bad as all those other people you judge for not being just like you.0
Most Helpful Guy
No, taking into account a potential spouse's religion is not a bad thing. It is an important issue that the two of you would need to aligned about or it could cause major problems down the line. And as a Christian, marriage for you is more than just a social contract or legal arrangement. It's a holy union of two souls in the sight of God, so if marry a woman that isn't Christian, she won't understand that aspect of it.
That being said, that doesn't mean you should reject a woman right off the bat just because she isn't already Christian. If she's avidly following another religion, it might be tougher to bring her to God's grace. There are a lot of people out there than don't know what they believe and could use guidance. In either case, you never know when God with open someone's heart. To that end, I would say just be honest. There is no good reason to lie about this and it might actually make her give her faith or lack therof a reconsideration.0