My brother and I use to be really close. he's 10 years older so he was almost like a father figure to me. However when he found out that my father (we have different dads) had abused me when I as younger, he refused to talk to my mother, who really didn't know the abuse was happening. Fat forward to 6 years later and he still won't talk to her. he's also starting to ignore me and is a jerk to my sister becuase we refuse to not talk to her.
The main reason I am thinking of not inviting him is that I don't want to worry about how he is treating my mom and my sister my whole wedding. I don't want him to ruin things. I don't think he will do anything dramatic but blatantly ignoring people is super hurtful too and I don't want drama.
It's just so weird to think that I always imagined him walking me down the aisle and now that it is happening he might not even be there at all. I'm afraid that not inviting him would forever burn the bridge that I'm not sure I want to.
Most Helpful Guy
i'd say invite him. but you could express to all parties that you hope there will be no drama as it is your wedding day
my parents divorced about 15 years ago. still my mom and my grandmom (mom's mom) still have deep deep seeded resentment towards my father (although he really did nothing wrong). they were both present at my wedding and i will say it was slightly stressful because my mom and grand mom both made comments about my dad's girlfriend being there... but ultimately it didn't ruin the day and i could imagine not inviting people so close to me0
Most Helpful Girl
You do whatever is right for you. If this was a situation that I was in, I would approach him with this concern. I would tell him that it's hurtful and worrisome that a conflict could take place in my wedding. Then I would ask for his agreement that he would be cordial with the other family members. If he won't agree to that, then don't invite him. If you really think he'll create a scene, don't invite him. However, I think you should try your best to have him there. It could only make the rift between you larger if you don't include him. Additionally, I imagine looking back (if all went well), you'd be happy that you're brother got to witness your day.0