Why once a guy is hurt he is so afraid of getting into something serious?

Hi you guys! Its been a while, actually 10months. Well if you read my first question it will give you a little incite of how everything started. Well My guy and I are still dating and he stopped seeing the other girl as of November. He and I stopped seeing each other in June and rekindled our relationship in October. Since then I also stop seeing the other guy that was in my life. Well here we are today 6 months strong in consistently dating, sleeping his place, countless calls and texts, gifts and family gatherings but yet we are NOT committed! He says he is afraid of getting hurt by being in another relationship that ends bad. Although he says he loves me and I do love him. He has a lot of trust issues and believes people can't even trust themselves how can we expect to trust someone else. He has valid points when we have this discussion over and over again but it still doesn't change the fact that I am willing to take a chance and he is not. Every time I try to end the relationship do to the fact he won't commit he claims I'm being selfish and isn't taking into consideration of his feelings. That I want what I want when I want. That I'm not willing to just be patient and see where this may take us. So I ask my guys and girls am I being too inpatient? It's been 6 months! He claims he isn't sleeping with anyone else and he loves me, and I can vouch that he treats me very good. Yet his cell phone is always ringing and I can't help but to think it's another woman, and often we get into arguments because that's how I feel. He tells me that "I care more about what I think he is doing then caring about what he is doing". I don't know, is he right? Help me out guys and girls! Thanks!


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  • 6 months doesn't mean you should be expecting any proposal, if he knows you're understanding towards his situation maybe that's why he's with you for so long? He needs someone to lean on and understand him and show him that the women he dates are worth trusting. He trusts you that's why he's not committing so he doesn't give you any false hope and he knows you're different. You should trust him back without being paranoid and thinking he's cheating on you. OR he's just not ready to settle down and just really into friends with benefits. I'm not too sure but you're gonna have to see what your gut tells you.

    • Thanks Sarcastic for responding! You have valid points and I'm so happy to get someone's else point of view. I try and try to trust him it's just so hard, but at the same time if Idon't get it together I know I'm going to run him away. Geesssh! I wish this was easier! & You are so right I am the Paranoid Queen!! Lol it's sickening to me so I know it has to be sickening to him. Well wish me luck! I'm gonna try to think more positive and wait til I actually have a reason to be so distrusting. Thx!

    • Anytime, you just need someone to be supporting you. I know through a relationship when one partner feels lack of trust they feel alone, because it feels like the other partner doesn't understand. But it's okay I totally get where you're coming from. I wish you the best of luck!