Am I thinking too much?

I am in a long distance relationship. We live in a different country. We first know each other on facebook. We talk a lot on yahoo/skype and also phone call/text. Even though we are far, but we spent time with each other a lot. After 8months of dating, he came to meet me for the first time. He met my family and friend. He proposed me and got engaged. It was the best 10days in my life. When he back to his country, he lost his job. All our plan changed. We can't afford for me to go there at the soonest. Now its been 8months since we last met. And he just recently get a job since the economy is not good. He move to different city. He met new friends. Our time with each other become less. 1st that he is working and 2nd he always went out with his friend on weekend.

Recently, I saw a message in facebook from a girl (one of his new friends). The message is so symbolic and its like they "kissed". I got mad and I asked him. He told me that it is not as what I thought. He explained to me what the girl mean. As far as I know him, I can trust him. But I just feel that he is kinda changed. He told me he need some space and time because he is depressed.

He said he is trying to adapt to the new environment, work and etc. and he is also stressed that he and his dad is not talking for a long time. He haven't talk with his dad for almost a year. He told me that he hate his dad because he saw his dad is being mean to his mom when he was kids (His mom and dad already divorced now and ever since he never meet his real mom). But deep inside him, he love his dad and miss him. I saw one of his friend emailed him too telling him to be strong and have faith that someday he will be able to bring me to his country. So I know he is really depressed..

But recently too, he changed his pws (email, fb and etc). I asked him why, he told me that its because he wants me to believe him. and he told me its because I got mad easily whenever I saw something and make a negative conclusion right away without asking him. He tells me he wants me to SEE him and trust him without the need to check on him. I know what he said is true, because I always think negative. I have trust issue effect from my previous relationship and I feel insecure. Which I know I shouldn't.

I emailed his dad recently and just being friendly. I know he want to talk with his dad and miss him. His dad replied me. But it is not as what I expect. His dad say all the bad things about him and ask me to not believe anything he (my fiance) told me. Things getting complicated. I didn't tell him about what his dad told me, I don't want to make their relationship worst. My fiance knows I emailed his dad. He thank me because he really wants to talk with his dad. But after get the reply from his dad this afternoon I am speechless.

I don't know. I want to trust him.But negative thinking keeps coming back. and with the email I just got from his dad makes me even more confuse. Should I just believe him?but why his dad email me like that?


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  • you should just trust him, your fiance. just trust him, and long distance isn't that bad if you guys really love each other and are planning to get married soon. the sooner the better =)

    good luck

    • Thank you. Yes I want to trust him. We love each other so much, just recently he kinda change. But he told me the reason is because he is depressed and he need a little time for him to get back to his normal self.. We still spend time with each other now just that not as much as before.

      Yes, but the first thing is to get me there and we need a lot of money. He just got a job. So now we are saving for me to go there. Maybe I am thinking too much...Anyway thank you once again:-)

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