He sent a message to say that he just wanted to be friends..I cried for days. Young guys, I need your input please!

To cut a long story short..I am new to Canada..also newly separated after 16 years of being in a very lonely marriage..I met a man 15 years my junior but he lives 2 hrs away.. For the first two or three months I found love and passion I have never known..This young man seemed to be head over heels in love with me and I was crazy over him..We seemed compatible in every way and I was happier in those few months then I have ever been in my life..He used to come to my town and stay in a hotel to be with me on some weekends..

Then it all changed...almost overnight..He sent a message to say that he just wanted to be friends..I cried for days..He became abusive and I felt ill with hurt..We used to go on skype almost every evening..usually after 12am..Once he told me not to text because he was seeing somebody else..He then told me after 2 days that he lied and that he was with nobody..But I noticed whenever somebody called his cel while on skype he would turn the sound to mute..

Still we hardly missed a day of not communicating and slowly we seemed to find our way back to each other..however he did not want to make a trip to my town again..I went to his town about two months ago and he picked me up at the hotel..He took me for coffee and we spoke but we never touched each other..He avoided the subject..When I got back home he became possessive..wanted to know who I was seeing..asked me to delete some people off facebook..It made no sense that he was acting this way..

suddenly about three weeks ago he told me to leave him alone..I cried again..felt ill and could not get out of him WHY..He did however respond in text messages..he also agreed to come on skype every day but not on cam..His response or answers were always one or two word phrases ("ya".."ttyl" or "k")..He did not hold decent conversations with me anymore..just short answers..Every day I asked him WHY he changed so much but he just said "I don't know"..Yesterday we spoke on skype (without the cam) ..it seemed like everything was OK again..he seemed normal and he even asked me to send him some sexy pics of myself..He asked me if I would like to come online at 1am and I said "of course"..I accidentally said "I love you so much" and he ended "I love you too xoxoxox"..I was besides myself with happiness..but when 1am came he was not online..I tried to call but his cell just rang..I fell asleep and tried again at 2am..It just rang..This morning his cell was off..

I am back here for advice..for anything I can grab on to for some encouragement or for some hope..

If there are any young guys who can tell me what might be going on in his mind...PLEASE I NEED YOUR ADVICE!


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What Guys Said 2

  • I know your situation sucks..and I tried to think of a way to sugar coat it...BUT...

    Hate to be blunt. You're out.

    Look at his actions, and not his words. Don't try to justify why you got let go. It will only cause you more stress and pain.

    Read your story again, and just look at what he did, not what he said.

    Life is a bitch, and so is this guy.

    Only encouragement I have is to grow from it and move on.

  • Sounds to me like he doesn't want to hurt you but... you lost him. :(


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