I want the man who I fell deeply in love with back!

I love this guy... I've known him for 3 years and he proposed to me on Christmas and of course I said yes because he made me so happy he filled in that empty piece of me there were times where I actually cried after kissing him because I was so in love with him. His personality and himself were both so beautiful in my eyes. He was perfect.

Now.. a month later it has all changed and not for the better. After having sex with him and spending more and more time which each other he's just not being that guy I used to know. He used to call me 2 and 3 times a day since he lives an hour away and now I don't get phone calls for days... not even a text message saying hi. He's hurting me emotionally... I love him so much but I miss that guy he used to be. His excuse is that he's been to busy to do anything... nothing has changed in the past month with him so how can he be too busy to give a 5 min phone call and at least let me know or even a text message. I'm getting fed up but I feel like I would be doing the wrong thing by breaking the relationship off.

On top of all this... I'm worried about the dead end job he works at making minimum wage... it's not a big issue now but what if I ever wanted children? How would he help me support them and provide for them if he can't even take care of himself. He's 23 has no education and still lives at home with his mother. I love him but what do I do? Would it be wrong to break the relationship off after being engaged for only a month? Should I give it more time? I've already told him over and over we don't talk enough. He tells me I'll call I'll call you babe and that call just never comes. I want the man who I fell deeply in love with back!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe he is actually busy...but he should call you if he hasn't seen you in awhile. I wouldn't break off the engagement though. You seem to really care about him and maybe things will change in the next couple of months or so. He could be scared of proposing to you last month, a lot of guys of scared of making a big commitment. And getting married to someone is the biggest one of all.

    Hopefully he'll come around and open up to you about his feelings. maybe something is on his mind and he doesn't know how to talk. about with you.


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  • My friend is the same age as you are and she got married in August and moved to another country for her husband. She doesn't work and they are living off his paycheck (which is quite ok, but still too little for two people) and there has started to become many arguments because the guy feels that he cannot take care of her properly.

    I guess that might be worrying your guy also, he feels a lot of responsibility in the future.

    I don't think you should break off the engagement, the easiest is to tell him that you expect him to call you more often as he used to and all your worries.

    If you marry you have to be able to talk to each other and discuss important things.

    Otherwise there will be no future.

  • You are too young to get married. If you really insist on it, stay engaged for a few years. See if he decides you go to college. As far as him changing? Tell him how you feel.

    • Since when is 24 too young to get married?

    • I think 30 is good.. Just kidding, I thought you guy's were 21!! I should have read a little better.. I do hope it works out for guys though!!! Best of luck

  • He probably feels that he has you now and that he doesn't have to try so hard to get you or maybe he is scared that he can't support you with his low pay job. Tell him to meet you at your house if he ask why tell him that to just show up that's its nothing bad. Don't tell him that you need to talk because he is just going to come over with a attitude that your just being drama. Just tell him that its a surprise. Make him a dinner. After the dinner tell him how your deeply feel. Not the job thing because he will look at you as a gold digger. If he doesn't change then just brake it off, but give it time 3-5 months tops. Tell him that you need to know that he is willing to take the train with you and not miss it. This is a metaphor. Hope this helps.