My girlfriend cheated on me recently with her ex boyfriend - should I still propose to her this April?

My girlfriend has cheated on me and yet I was going to propose to her this April!

Am wondering, should I really go on and do this?

When we met she told me she had no boyfriend and that she was happy I loved her very much because men in her past life had mistreated her so much and that she has finally found someone who truly values her and that she had gained her confidence back.

We are in a long distance relationship and we meet every 3month for three weeks.

She cheated on me with her ex boyfriend who she had live with in same house for 1 ½ years and that he told her he’s sorry for how he treated her and that he wants her back. She told him that she had moved on (with me and that we are serious because we are going to marry) and that he should not expect to be seeing her again.

She has had 5 boyfriends in the past and tells me that he’s the one she had loved most among all of them.

We tried making a baby the last time we met and now am wondering if she is really a serious, because why would she sleep with another man when she think she might be pregnant with my child (that’s what her argument was until when I told her to tell me the exact truth and she finally confessed everything to me. She says they used protection but am now fearful that they may not have used condoms since the man would want also may be to make her pregnant- because he has done it to another girl before.)

And if she finally tells me she is pregnant, can I really be sure that the kid is mine? (She has done 2 pregnancy tests since I left on Jan 19th but still says she has pregnancy symptoms.)

Please Note: we had sex 3 days before her periods and 1 day after her period and then I left for work.

She has apologized a million times and says she is very sorry for let me down and that she will never do it again.

She says he called her to his place and that she wanted to tell him about me and our plans and they ended up having sex.

Am devastated because, I’ve always loved her and all our parents know us and that we intended to marry next year.

Could the distance have been the problem? (Because she actually has a very high sex drive).

If she could cheat on me when she thinks she might be pregnant with my baby, how sure am I that she will never do it again?

she has told me shes deeply embarrassed and very sorry and say 'i wish you could come home now or I come and be with you now ,we could talk about this one big mistake that has brought us so much pain, we could laugh and smile again.whatever the pregnancy results,it will be ok because the DNA test will strengthen our bond: if I am pregnant, the baby is yours.

Please help me with your advise!


Most Helpful Guy

  • I have to tell you dude, I myself have been with my wife only a short time when I learned that she'd slept with a guy on weeks before we got married. There'd been several other men that I'd been suspicious about over the several years we'd dated however it was only this one guy that she's admitted to having sex with.

    It was "truth time" only after I found out for myself. Prior to that when I'd ask about him she'd always say he was just a friend and nothing there.

    It's been over a year now and I will tell you; had I had known that she'd f***ed around on me prior to us getting married I would NOT have gone through with the wedding at all. I find myself every day bitter at the fact of feeling like a large part of our marriage is based on a huge lie and I was tricked into it without having known 100% about her. I'm still not for sure that I will stay in the marriage. I don't trust her, feel at times that she's a slut on the prowl and find myself waiting for another guy to come along that sh'e go down on and spread her legs for. Can you tell I'm bitter? Anyway, I say yourself a favor and move on and find someone that will be faithful to you and loves you. Not someone that she "loved the most" of all. If she's with you she should love YOU most and not out trying to find someone to satisfy her else where. They will always be deeply sorry and embarrased after you find out the truth. MOVE ON and find someone worth being with...she will break your heart if you stay. Spoken from experience on this one...MOVE ON and cut your ties with her now.

    • Sir, I feel soo sorry for you, I thought I was in a bad state but you are way beyond my misery. I truly understand the pain you are going through, am only praying that she is now pregnant already, becasue if the kid is mine( DNA test!) I realy don't want that kid to suffer, I want a happy family wiz kids raised by both parents( because I mised having 2 parents myself en promised not to have my kids go through dat.) at the end of the day, you will have to divorce her because personally I wldnt tek it!

    • Sorry, ment to say that am now only praying that she is not pregnant because I don't want my kid to suffer!

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • A couple concerns two people. Please don't think about your family or friends cause finally the only important people two only.

    She cheated on you and she's sorry, she wants to be the mom of your child. The thing is when she was with this ex, she didn't get any trust in herself (this is what I understand in your question), and now thanks to you she's more trustful. But this guy had been a big part in her life, and I think that what happened was what she wanted to happen a long time ago when she was with him or when he broke up with her (him to get back to her, wanting babies etc...). And that now he represents the past and you the future.

    You can't be sure she won't cheat on you again..You have to believe that it won't happen again. Just be sure about who she is and everything is gonna be alright.

    And if you want to propose to her..just do whatever your heart tells you. Sometimes we have to forget thinking about things and just let us go our feelings.

    Good luck : )

  • Why are you guys trying to get to pregnant in a long distance relationship? this whole realtionship seems kinda of fishy and like a bad idea to me. I say move on.

    • Symphonee, we had agredd to wed soon and had even planned to give up my job abroad so in december this year. she introduced me to her parents and I did the same. she has a problem with fybroids and the gyno adivsed us to have a baby As soon as we can so that we don't have difficulties ahead. I was even shoping for the ring and we where ment to have our wedding in december if she had gotten pregnant. we lived togther b4 all our friends know we are planing to wed!!

    • Are you honestly sure that this is the only time that she has cheated and if you guys have been making these plans for a while, why cheat? You will never be sure if she will never cheat again. You honestly need to stop and think about this and all of the reprecussions.

What Guys Said 1

  • Here's some advice. Stop being such a dork and get rid of this girl OR at the very least, don't marry her.

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