When/how would you bring up marriage?

My boyfriend recently moved in with me and things have been great. I never wanted to live with someone before marriage, but felt it made most financial sense for both of us and we have only been together 10 months.

We have never fully addressed marriage though I have indicated I want to get married. Some of his recent financial decisions have caused me to perceive that he is not financially planning for a ring/wedding.

My friends and family think I should bring up marriage to make sure we are on the same page with getting married in 1-3 years rather than waiting a long time.

What should I say? Should I even bring it up?


Most Helpful Girl

  • lol well before you waste a year or two on him...I would at least see what his take is on marriage.

    I would just randomly ask one day have you ever thought about marriage? Do you believe in getting married or are you fine without the whole I vow my life to you thing?

    Ask the question but don't make it seem like your telling him to marry you?

    Don't say: At what age do you think you would be ready to get married? or Do you think I'm marriage material?

    I believe that if marriage is defiantly something you believe in doing? than you are not going to want to be in a relationship with someone for a few years or soo...and they respond with...

    Uhm marriage...I don't believe in that...somewhere down the line.

    That would be a waste. again that's if your looking to one day get married.

    Well hope that helped




Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • my god.

    being together 10 months and you're looking at his financial decisions, ring, wedding, etc... you're insane.

    be together some time, like A FEW YEARS, to actually see if you two are compatible after this love charade fades away, then start thinking about marriage.

    • Well, don't you know he needs to put away three months salary for a ring? *heavy sarcasm.* He needs to be planning ahead!

  • 10 months?! People these days rush in to marriage too quickly, realize they settled down too early and end up getting divorced.

  • Sooooo hunny, what should we name our kids?

    Do you see yourself growing old and wrinkly with me?

    Where do you want to move when we get married?

    You are like oxygen. I can never get enough of you. Let's get married.

    3 years no ring, I'm cutting your balls off.

    Try em and let us know how it worked out. If they didn't work we'll come up with more.

    If marriage becomes obligatory and a source of stress, things will go sour.

  • He'll ask you when he's ready


What Girls Said 4

  • Never...

    If you never get married, you'll never get divorced...

  • Wait until at least a year. I really think ten months is too soon to move in together. But if you want to know where he stands on that, maybe you should ask him where he sees the relationship going. Don't point it to marriage, just as him where he sees the two of you in the future. Then kind of go from there.

  • Yeah you need to communicate with him.

  • You two just recently moved in together and you're already thinking marriage? You should give the living together thing some time before bringing that up. When you live with someone after a while your guard comes down and you'll see the real them, not just what you see when you spend part of your time together. There will be little or big things each of you do that will get to one another. You should give it some time to let guards down and see if you two could actually live together first.

    I do agree you should make sure you're both on the same page when it comes to marriage but, you should wait a bit before bringing it up. I personally wouldn't bring up your 1-3 years thing or tell him your family is asking, that's more than likely going to send him running.

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