My husband thinks our baby hates him

I guess he doesn't really mean that but the point is that he is having an immensley hard time to build a relationship to our son.

I gave birth when he was deployed overseas and now that he is back I often feel he doesn't really know what to do with him. Like how to hold him,feed him or just play with him. Has anyone here who has kids felt like that? How did you get over it?

I would help but he says he can handle his own child by himself and he's a doctor afterall. And I thought that was fine, that it would just take time.He just got back from war afterall.

But latley he doesn't even want to try anymore. He says it's obvious our son doesn't like him. Maybe I should just give him time but this really bothers me. I don't understand how he can feel this way?


Most Helpful Guy

  • How old is your son?

    The way I built a relationship with my daughter was to show her how much I love her mother and how much she loves me.

    I would play with her mom in bed, make her laugh and just have lots of fun, by tickling and kissing her, to show our daughter that her mother trusts me very much. Then I would put my attention on her and do the same things with her, but not rough. They start to acknowledge and see pretty good around 3-6 months old, that's when you make the strongest bonds. Actually since birth, but at that age they see and react better and can even move their wobble head heheh.

    If he's still young, try to lay him on your husbands bare chest , without any cologne, he should get used to his smell first and touch and warmth.

    Your husband should also be willing to spend some time with him and just be persistent, nothing can describe the love that a child can give it's parents, it's just that beautiful.

    Once he experiences that, everything will fall in place.

    He should just not give up like he would never give up on his brothers in arms.

    • this is one of the most enjoyable questions, I've answered in a while. TY

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Some babies just naturally hate their fathers. Just have another one and it will all work out.


What Girls Said 3

  • Maybe you should leave for a few hours and let your husband babysit. I suspect he might be a little intimidated because you've been taking care of this baby for quite a while and you've gotten good at it. Some alone time with the little sweetheart might just be the practice he needs to get confident. Make sure your husband knows it's not easy at first but he has to keep at it.

    • LTwenty minutes. at the most. He doesn't know how to take care of the baby lol

    • The first time I was left alone with a baby was for 4 hours lol. It'll be fine as long as she leaves some general guidelines like when to feed, how to change, etc. :)

  • The only thing that comes to my mind as a solution is spending more one on one time with each other. I don't think anything can really just create a bond other than knowing someone and having them in your life for awhile you know. He definitely should not give up, just keep encouraging them to spend time together.

  • It takes a while for a baby to warm up to its father as opposed to its mother.

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