Many marriages go for counseling after one partner has cheated etc why? there are too many people out there so why waste your time?
Most Helpful Guy
That's falling short in so many points... First of all: When something like cheating happened (cheating as the very peak before murder), then that's a pretty bad time... And we promised in our vows to stick together in good times and in bad. So giving up there, when the going gets tough, that's breaking the vow, no matter what the other one did.
Besides that: Cheating takes three people. The couple which is screwing up their relationship - it's NEVER ever one of them, it's ALWAYS both - those who think, that it's all the partner's fault are just plain stupid and they will fail again: "The only constant in your many failures is you".
It doesn't matter which partner cheats. In the end it's the result of a long developement to which both have contributed a lot.
Counseling is there for those few people who really were serious when giving the vow and didn't just do it for a meaningless show. It's for those who really have loved their partner before and want to get things straigth. And it's for those who have the wisdom and humility to admit, that they also did their part.
Keeping up a happy relationship is really hard work. And actually: By far the biggest part of my work is "small" counseling: one of the spouses asking me how to make a special surprise for the other one. They're sometimes just clumsy and need some practical advice.1
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