Is it wrong to be jealous of other girls with less cheap boyfriends?

My boyfriend and I split costs all. the. freaking. time. That includes a 5$ meal at McDonald's, a sub at Subway, etc. He never pays for me, except for dinner on our anniversary or Valentine's or for a 3$ drink at the pub. I keep seeing these girls on YouTube showing off all the expensive gifts their boyfriends give them and all the sweet things they receive for certain occasions (success at something, when they are sick, etc.). Who doesn't want to be treated like a million bucks? I'm not too fond of our split-everything-or-one-of-us-with-owe-the-other-something "business-like" financial arrangements :(

Updates:
I'll add this, because some misters here seem to think I'm a selfish, greedy, feminine bitch:

Everytime we have dinner at my place, I cover the costs (10-20$ every time). I pay 12$ for public transportation every single time I go to his house and I never ask a penny from him. So when we split for a 5$ meal, I feel insulted, as if he felt threatened that I would steal from him. And I'm pretty sure I spend more money than him on his presents (Christmas, birthday).
We're both students in university. He's 2 years older than me and still lives with his family. We both pay our school bills but I too pay my apartment expenses (not the rent, but electricity, cable, cellphone --> approx. 150$ a month). So it's obvious that he has more money in the bank. At the end of each year, I barely have 1000$ left and my internship income must cover all of my expenses for the whole year. He doesn't pay any of that, so I kinda feel taken advantage of.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Does it really matter though tbh? I mean if you like the guy than it shouldn't really matter.

    Whilst I'm not denying your point about who wouldn't want to be treated like a million bucks - I want to ask you something. Do you ever buy your boyfriend lunch or anything like that?

    If the answers 'yes' - then I would say it's fine to feel that way. I mean I would like to be treated equally.

    If the answer's 'no' - is it reasonable to expect your partner to pay for your sh*t when you haven't done the same for him? When in this day and age, you're most likely financially independent?

    (It's blunt but I honestly didn't know any other way to put it)

    Tbh I agree with the guy who said I would run if the girl expects me to buy her a lot of things xD

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    • Every Friday or so I go to the grocery store to buy stuff for us to eat for dinner. Costs me 10-20$ every time and I never ask a penny from him. I pay 12$ for public transportation every single time I go to his house and I never ask a penny from him. So when we split for a 5$ meal, I feel insulted, as if he felt threatened that I would steal from him. And I'm pretty sure I spend more money than him on his Christmas presents so... Yeah, I'm not whining because I'm not gifted a Vuitton purse.

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What Guys Said 5

  • Yeah, I couldn't treat a girl like this, I like to buy gifts for the girls I date, love seeing that moment light up in her eyes and the way it makes her feel makes me feel good, so I don't understand a guy always demanding to split everything, don't know any guys like that,x

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    • Yeah, that's kinda what I had in mind. I'm not greedy, but I too would like that sort of attention once in a while. I'm sure you make a great boyfriend, keep up with the sweet gestures :)

    • Thankyou and I'm sure I shall,x

  • Sounds like you're the one being cheap (not wanting to pay your share), are you sure you really love him? Not every guy likes to pay for their woman all the time, plus he still paid during special occasions which I think is good enough already.

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    • I'm being cheap? For christsake, I spent over a hundred bucks, maybe close to 200 for his Christmas and birthday presents and I have zero income for the whole year. I'm a student. Check my comment above and you'll see I have way more expenses to cover than my boyfriend and I'm younger. And it pisses me off that we're always splitting when I often spend money to go see him and for the food when we have dinner at my place.

    • lady, if it really bothers you then you should bring it up to him. People are different, he's probably just the type who counts every penny he spent. It's also very possible that he isn't aware of it or if he's a student maybe he doesn't want to waste his parents money and never had that much allowance to begin with.

      Go and talk to him but don't accuse him of anything, to me this is actually quite a petty problem that you could solve by simple communication.

  • Imo I think he was involved with a golddigger in the past and , to a fault, goes dutch on everything to ensure that you aren't that type of woman.

    Has he ever mentioned dealing with a golddigging girl in the past? His behavior sure indicates that.

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    • No I'm his first girlfriend :/

    • then he probably doesn't know how unspecial that him not splurging on you makes you feel. ..i say bring it up to him

  • If a girl "expects" me to buy her lots of things I'd go running the other way - fast. :D

    Sure, there is such a thing as being too cheap. I don't know how his finances are, and that makes a big difference. You really need to take that into account. Does he have plenty of money and is just penny pinching? Is he being responsible and trying to put some money in the bank (which is the right thing to do)? It all depends. There is a balance between responsible spending/saving and being just plain cheap.

    But seriously if some girl wanted to be "treated like a million bucks" I'd be getting the heck away from her real darn fast.

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    • We're both students in university. He's 2 years older than me and still lives with his family. We both pay our school bills but I too pay my apartment expenses (not the rent, but electricity, cable, cellphone --> approx. 150$ a month). So it's obvious that he has more money in the bank. At the end of each year, I barely have 1000$ left and my internship income must cover all of my expenses for the whole year. He doesn't pay any of that, so I kinda feel taken advantage of.

    • Don't judge us too harshly, we can only go by what we see. We're starting to get a bigger picture now. :) I think the best approach might be to start dropping strong hints that this is financial burden on your part and you need to cut expenses. It's probably better to open dialog from that POV rather than complaining about his side. Hopefully a full dialog can open to work it out as a couple rather than as two people keeping score.

  • Equality, ladies. Suck it up.

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    • It's not equality. I'm spending "invisible" sums of money (transportation, dinner at my place) all the freaking time and he never pays for any of that stuff. And no, he doesn't have any equal expenses on his part to make it even.

What Girls Said 5

  • Love doesn't need to be shown through money or presents. Though it would be fun for you to get treated to something. Maybe he has some money issues? Or you could show him you don't mind to treat (and get treated) to a meal. So next time you go out and he wants to pay, tell him it's on you. So maybe next time he'll take the check for himself?

    But couples where the woman receives diamonds and jewelry and flowers and whatnot, are mostly the exception. Getting presents all the time would make me suspicious, lol.

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  • Being treated like a million bucks doesn't mean he has to pay for everything. It should just matter how he treats you or he always shows you a good time. You have a job right? It shouldn't matter if you have to pay. Those girls on YouTube showing off expensive gifts are just spoiled. I would never expect my boyfriend to buy me something expensive or even anything at all. A gift is a gift, it shouldn't be expected. When my husband and I were dating we always took turns paying or we would split the costs. It's the time spent together that matters, not what material items you get.

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    • If it bothers you so much, ask him about it? Maybe he has many problems you don't know about or what not. Or maybe he just doesn't realize this. But if it really bothers you so much, why not find a guy who won't be cheap?

  • Honestly you should really say something to him, because that would bother me a lot myself.

    I can't imagine being with a guy like that, that's disgusting splitting $5

    He needs to change asap, because he would never keep a girl like this .

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  • All I can say is, communication. Be open and let him know you feel like this.

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  • I definitely understand where your coming from, it really does suck

    Every girl wants to be treated like a princess

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