Do men never tell you they aren't into you?

I have some trouble understanding the guy I am (was?) dating, or maybe every guy.

I acted a bit insecure when he spent an entire day just complaining about work and talking about himself, and said I didn't want to bother him, but maybe we could hang out later or something if he was still interested in me. He states "I didn't say I wasn't" and asked why, I was honest and he kinda got all upset for it.

Next thing I know he isn't talking to me. Against my own judgement, I ended up contacting him after a week to talk things out, maybe I was too clingy, but he is now saying maybe we're too different and not compatible.

WTH is maybe, in my mind he's either interested or not, there's no "I'm not sure we're compatible", why can't he just say so clearly?

I told him things like differences can be worked out if both parties are willing, but no reply after 4 days.

I hate I'm acting like this crazy insecure girl when I was never like this before (never fell in love before), but was wondering if this is him telling me he really isn't interested and get away, or what could he possible be thinking?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • He might be thinking that on top of everything he was dealing with that particular day you seem to be thinking about how it all affected you rather than just being a comforting partner to him.

    Saying something like, "maybe we could hang out later or something if he was still interested in me."

    Is a big sign of insecurity and can be a turn off. However it doesn't seem like it warrants suddenly breaking off communication.

    I think you should reach out to him and ask him what's going on. Tell him you didn't mean to sound weird or insecure but were just joking around or whatever.

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    • I was trying to be comforting to him, but my entire week had been hell as well and he never once asked... I kinda let it get the best of me and snapped, but we talked about that.

      He seems to be more upset with the compatibility thing, but I've no idea at this point if that's just him being nice and finding a good excuse to break-up. I dunno.

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    • Thank you for understanding! Maybe I should be dating you (or someone like you) instead, haha

      Anyway, maybe 4 days isn't a long time... Hopefully he'll think things through and understand what I meant. If not, then there's not much that can be done, right?

      BTW, what would your answer to the question be "do men never tell you they aren't into you?"?

    • And maybe I'm the weird one trying to make things work...

      Most of my friends would have said NEXT by now, but isn't that almost like saying if everything doesn't work out perfectly from the start then it's a no go? Like no trying... Hmm

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