I lost a friend. How can I get to talking to her again?

I am sorry this is long but I really need some opinions.

I lost a friend some time ago and I don't know what to do. We used to sit next to each other on the bus and talk everyday for about 2 years at school. I only saw her as a friend at first, but the more I got to know her, the more I started to realise I have feelings for her. So one day I got the courage to ask her out on a date. I was a little worried about rejection. but the mindstate I was going with was that if she said no, then I wouldn't be too upset about it because we would still be friends and talk to each other, and as long as we were still friends I would be ok. So I asked her out, and she told me she wasn't up to going out that night. I was a little sad, but I was ok with being friends. So I smiled and said ok and we both said see you later. But what sucks is that we didn't see each other later. A few days later I go on snapchat and i see that she deleted me from her contacts. I message her on facebook to see if I had done something to make her upset. She doesn't reply. We don't talk for days, the days turn to weeks, and then the weeks turn to a couple of months. I want my friend back but I don't know what to do. I want to try to message her on facebook but I can't bring myself to do it. My friendship with her is on the line and I'm not a little worried like I was when I asked her out, I am down right scared that we will never be able to go back to talking to each other like we used to. I thought about letting her go and thought about how it might be for the best. But she always comes back to mind. I feel cowardly for not just doing something about it, but I don't know what to do. What should I do and what should I say?

Guys, what would you do in my situatuon?
Girls, if you knew that a guy was in a situation like this and the girl was you, what would you want him to do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • You fell in the friend zone, you can't get her sexual feelings now so she cut contact off with you until that feeling comes back to her. You postponed asking her out for way to Lengthy a time. She lost interest in you sexually because you let her discover you without sex which bores her into keeping you as a friend and not wanting to risk hurting you because she knows you so well. You didn't compel her very well in two years. She now has to adjust. You can only move on now or hope and pray that you meet her a year or two from now where she misses you and wants to catch up on things in rememberence needing a boyfriend. That's highly unlikely. Hey at least she didn't keep you in the nice guy friend zone doing you a favor. That's how woman are, live and learn, next time don't wait so long having her attention for 2 years. Man she was being patient.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • you should start off slow, but text her now.

    • I messaged her and she saw it. But she didn't reply. :(

    • You have to ignore any and all urges to contact her now. If you don't she will continue to hold you responsible for making her wait so long. You need to let her miss you and find something else to do. Very difficult and sucks but that is what you must do. Any thing else will show as desperate and confirm to her your weakness where she doesn't want to hurt and continue the missing separation process all over again. You must not contact her again but only reply when she contacts you. She saw your message so don't push it. Get your mind on yourself or suffer more. Got it?

What Guys Said 1

  • Its just a relationship sting, its gonna hurt at first but as you realize that mostly everyone you meet in life you'll never see again you will become desensitized to the sting. Right now you just gotta follow your heart wherever it takes you since you are so young its important. This sting is actually valuble because it gives you a purpose in your life. Keep your soul healthy and do everything in your power to reach your old friend.

    Ain't nothing more sexy than a ambitious muthafucka!

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