I will attend university in fall 2015. I have trouble making friends in hs due to cliques and everyone being busy a lot. I made a small group of friends in senior year I felt bad about that and that is why my grades lowered (still got into uni). I never really got any dates (not even prom) or had much friends, and when I did have a crush on a cute girl, the following problems usually came.
A. She was almost always with her friends and did not let me hang with her since she was closely knit with them.
B. She had a boyfriend.
C. She was busy with homework / AP classes or summer courses.
It also does not help that I fantasize a lot of things. Like going out with friends, going to parties, and getting drinks / fast food / watching movies with them. Or even sharing a romantic moment with a girl in Hawaii / go with a date to a fraternity formal. So, I have some questions.
1. What can I do if I like a girl, but she isn't letting me hang out with her, even as a friend?
2. I will study computer science, which is male dominated and time consuming. so will I be strapped of opportunities to make friends and meeting girls?
3. How do I ask a girl to a frat/winter formal?
4. What can I do to succeed academically in college?
5. How can I find / create a social circle who I can go out / study with?
6. If I see a cute girl in class / school club , how to ask her out? Should I wait or ask her before another guy does?
7. I'm Indian and lacking muscle, so will that be a problem?
8. I mostly crush on Asian girls, especially Japanese. So will learning the language help me?
9. Is college better than high school socially?
10. My only hobbies include video games and movies, so will my opportunities for friends decrease?
11. I am not too funny, but I'm nice, so will I be disregarded by fun loving people?
12. How do I fulfill my fantasies and deal with my problems with girls?
13. Girls, what is the best way to become a good friend or even a boyfriend?
14. Are frats expensive? Are they worth it for a solid friend circle / formal dates and how DO I afford to pay? Are there other options for friends or dance dates (my college Filipino club hosts winter balls)
15. I was viewed as a nice person in hs. should I stop being nice since nice guys finish last?
16. How cliquey is college?
17. What if a girl rejects me and she's the only (certain race) on campus or ps4 owner
18. How to be more confident
Most Helpful Girl
1. Move on if she doesn't make the time for you she isn't interested. I will move mountains to make time for a guy I'm interested in so if she isn't making time for you she doesn't like you and you're wasting your time and emotional energy on her.
2. One of my male housemates what a CompSci major and he was very good (and loved) what he was doing and seemed to still have time to play video games and what not. He had friends in other majors and faculties and was very involved with different programs involved with his major. Sorry that’s repetitive. But he would go on trips to Montreal with his group and they would party a bit or hang out in a pub and then the next day do their presentations or workshops or whatever they set out to do. Long story short, he has a very active social life and seems to be excelling at academics too. His major is a complete fit for him and he’s a friendly and talkative guy so your major should not get in the way AT ALL of your making friends and meeting girls.
3. Ask a girl who you’ve been talking to and that you’re friendly with. More comfortable she is with you and closer you two are the more likely she’ll say yes. Asking a stranger who you don’t talk to much but think is cute is not super likely she’ll say yes, you still have a chance but it’s not a huge one. Asking in person is cuter and more impressive but you can also text her fb message her but again refer to the first two sentences I wrote. You don’t necessarily have to ask a girl out to every single dance or party, you can go to meet girls there too.
4. TIME MANAGEMENT IS KEY. It’s so cliche but it truly is. And everyone as a different learning curve for adjusting to university so allow yourself to adjust without reaming yourself out for not doing as well as you’d expect. Other stuff, take advantage of the resources on campus (a learning centre, peer tutoring, counselling, a writing centre that reads over papers, TA office hours, your professor). Do your readings, keep on top of what’s due when, look over your syllabus fully, check your emails regularly, be respectful to your Profs (they’re people too), give yourself enough time to write papers or lab reports etc, and edit them as well. My best friend at UPenn goes to see a tutor about her courses even when she doesn’t really need it just to be sure. Do your best, it is a huge adjustment and change from high school. They expect better quality work and you won’t be able to get away with things you may have in (con'd)0
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