How to stop the bodyshaming?

on my own body? So growing up mixed in an all white community it was bound to happen that i felt different or not good enough. Im half black and half white and until i was 12-13 i was the only darked sinn person in my intire grade, my intire handball team, an pretty much any activity i signed up for. I didn't mind at all because people excepted me and iwas well liked (i considered myself white until just some years a go)-But when i started to go through puberty i notice how different my body was built compared to the rest of the girl, and it ofc made me very insecure.

Most girls had smaller butts, very skinny legs, flat stomachs, slim arms. But i got way bigger boobs then everyone, and i started to notice that my butt was bigger then anyone elses, that my thighs were bigger and that my overarms were huge. I was never fat, I have always been fit, but my genes have decided that im going to have broad shoulders and big overarms..

I feel very unattractive because of it.. i can't help it.. Im fine, or okay with my body until i see it in a picture.. I think i look terrible, like a man, ... Whenever i see women with the same body shap as me i feel sorry for them (as terrible as that sounds).. Its not like i can diet my arms way either, my big sister is 20 pounds ligher then me and she still has "big" overarms.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You need to realize that there's nothing wrong with you. A wolf growing up among dogs will feel out of place as well.

    • i know.. but what i grew up with is my ideal if that make sense.. and since I dont look like that its difficult for men not to feel less attractive... i mean how many guys, or girls for that matter, thinks big overarms are attractive?

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    • There are all sorts of guys. Besides, most mothers who put on a bit of weight get bigger forearms - it's natural. (not saying you look pregnant, but that you may look womanly)

    • Thank you dudette :)

Most Helpful Girl

  • Whoa!!
    Your body isn't ugly! You're just curvy and that is awesome! A lot of the white girls who didn't have your boobs and butt were (and are) probably jealous because they don't have your curves. You should feel really feminine and everyone is a different shape and size anyway!
    I don't want to sound rude but, most people won't even notice anyway.
    The only person that will really see your imperfections is you! I'm pretty sure women who are 'skinny' wish they were more like you- a lot of my skinnier friends say they wish they were more curvy- so don't feel ashamed! Flaunt your body and embrace it because it isn't ugly, it's just different to the people who you grew up around. In my eyes, this may be an even better thing because it makes you stand out and seem even more beautiful.
    Hope this helped! Good Luck
    Lucy xx

    • aw thanks! it helped a little... i know that different doesn't necessarly mean worse.. i got compliments a lot, so I knew people didn't see me in a negative way.. but i got super aware of my body.. going on diets at the age of 15.. when im older i realise how stupid i was.. But i can't come over the fact that my arms are huge.. thatw the part of my body that wants to make me cry a little :/

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    • the only type of people who would me jealous of my huge overarms would be guys that lift... I have gotten the comment "i can see that you lift, your guns (overarms) are huge" .. I doubt that he said it to be rude.. but it kinda says it all

    • Aww just ignore them! Nobody's perfect!

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