For those who have experienced the death of an immediate family member: what happened, how did you cope, and how has your life been shaped by it?

I think in general, most young people don't truly grasp the effect of death on the living probably because most haven't experienced such close loss yet. For those of us who have experienced it, it's unfathomably difficult in more ways than one, and sometimes when you're really feeling the void, it feels like it's even hard to relate to your friends and extended family members. I've noticed what helps is just hearing what other people have been through... so I thought I would ask. What was your experience?


Most Helpful Guy

  • i lost my mother at 14 to Cancer, then my father at 17 after he drank himself to death. Losing his shit after she passed.

    there is no way to get over a loss for grief is an emotion that is uniquely yours. Plus, some people have extensive support networks while others have next to no one. You just have to be really honest with yourself and gentle. If you need to cry, cry, if you need to express, express. Alternatively, if you cannot face things, lock it a way in denial

    • Wow I'm speechless.. thats a lot of loss so close together and so young but old enough to understand. How did you get through that dark time if you don't mind me asking? I agree, a support system can make all the difference. It's never about getting over it because that won't happen as long as your memory is with you, but I suppose it's more about learning to live with it.

    • Mainly through denial. basically hiding in drink and drugs until I had a woman save me. in a word I was lucky, for was heading down the same path as my father and would have ended dead or in prison.

      Sometimes, after you are dealt real devastation, life offers you salvation when you are at your lowest ebb. You need to be willing to embrace it and luckily I saw the need to get my shit together

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What Guys Said 2

  • I let it all out alone once when my grandma died but only when no one was looking. It helped a lot. I had no stages of grief, I think it was just straight acceptance or maybe I went through them when she was sick. My family is more akin to grieve on their own. She was like a second mother to me. Fortunately, that was the only death that shook me.

  • Went on a drinking and gambling bing

    • Are you okay now?

    • Ya it was 4 years ago

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