Why is monogamy an issue in society when relationships are about choice?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I honestly don't know I guess it comes down to choices and a person facing their own desires vs that of your partners, communication also plays a vital part in this. I can't speak for others, but I have no desire to be involved in anything other then a monogamy relationship, this is one of the first things I discuss with and tell a gal before I start anything with her. So I need to know if she has a problem with that or if she wants something else because I won't force her to adhere to what I want if she wants something other then what I want.

    Basically it all comes down to communication and choices it's the key to everything, the key to avoiding a potentially disastrous relationship down the line or the key to having a long loving one with your partner. And in this day and age I think it is a fairy good idea to be pretty up front about what you want and were you would like things to go and your do (s) and don't (s).


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What Girls Said 1

  • bc people are closed minded and believe things should be done one way and thats it.


What Guys Said 3

  • i got into a back and forth with a person in favor of polyamorous relationships. he was very vocal that I was a sheep because, as I said me personally I am monogamous

    I feel like ultimately he wasn't trying to validate his position. by knocking down my lifestyle it made him feel better and more confident about his. by saying I'm a sheep it essentially elevates him to what he feels is a more authoritative position

    life is about choice and like you said in relationships I say do what you want as long as it doesn't negatively impact me. if someone is into polygamy that's fine I just ask you respect my choice the same way I'd respect yours.

  • What I can't understand why men and women who sleep around and put it about suddenly want to settle down at a certain age? It's as if society says you must enter a relationship, a marriage and have children and these people just tow in line with what is expected of them.

    Take my best friend, he's a slag, he lost his virginity at 16 and spent the best part of five years putting it about before entering a relationship. He's gone from being a dude that used to take women home, fuck them and throw them out in the morning to being the most devoted boyfriend who showers his girl with gifts and has become the perfect gentleman. It's all a pretence when he's with me he also bitches about her, the relationship and he refuses to go to night clubs because he knows he can't stay faithful.

    He's living a lie and I think most people in society are not monogamous and yet lie to themselves and try to conform to what is expected of them.

  • Well, I presume one could write books about this and I'm sure people have also done this already but essentially, it all comes down to history and religion (I'm only talking about the western hemisphere now).

    • I think it is pretty clear cut- if you want to play the field, stay single. Or if you feel the urge while in a relationship due to no longer being into your part, break it off

    • Show All
    • Agree, we had an open marriage and if anything it reinforced our bond

    • Yes, that's true. Honesty sometimes hurts. But I believe it's still "the royal path" as we'd call it in German. In the end, it will turn out to be the right choice. If you want to have a stable relationship (especially if you want to do frisky stuff like trying out sex with other people) you absolutely need honesty. It's like the foundation that a stable relationship can be built on. I've always believed that honesty is much more important than fidelity for example, so I've told my girlfriend: "look, you can have sex with other guys you find hot. That's no problem. However, I absolutely must need to know about it. I want to be informed and I don't want to be lied to. I want to know what's going on."
      At any rate, kudos to you for trying hard to lead an honest relationship. It's something tough... but as I said... in the end it will be worth it.

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