Say you have a boyfriend and he wants to sleep with a girl in his school. He has tried to talk to her maybe once but she didn't seem interested or she had a boyfriend but he still thinks about her from time to time. (There's Probably a 90% chance he'd sleep with her if she agreed)
Would this make you sad? Mad enough to dump him if you found out?
- Of course I'd dump him.Vote A
- I'd be upset and Id probably dump himVote B
- I'd be sad but I don't know if I would dump himVote C
- I wouldn't dump himVote D
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If my girlfriend would want to have sex with another guy, it would not be a big deal for me. In fact, I've even told her in the past that she's free to do that if she feels the desire (so far it hasn't happened). In my opinion, using sex to define loyalty is rather stupid and kinda archaic. There is so much more that makes up a relationship than sex. It would be much harder for me if my girlfriend suddenly developed a crush on another guy and thought this other guy was a really funny, cool, awesome, smart dude than if she simply wanted to find out what it's like to fuck another man. Just because she's got another penis inside of her doesn't actually change anything about our relationship. I would still be the one that she loves more than anything else and the one she finds cool. Also, I believe jealousy has a lot to do with a lack of confidence and self-esteem. For example just because you love chocolate ice cream doesn't mean you hate all other flavors of ice cream. It's totally possible to like different flavors at the same time. In the same way, it's possible to fuck more than one person and still be in love with just one person. Also, just because my girlfriend enjoys sex with another guy does NOT mean she hates sex with me. It also doesn't mean I'm worse at sex. It simply means she likes different flavors of ice cream and doesn't want to just have one. I don't really see a problem with that.
I find open relationships much more practical and worthwhile because they bypass the big problems of monogamous relationships. I see that all the people who've answered this question so far are at least 3 years younger than me. Some are 8 or even 9 years younger. At that age, most people still have a limited experience with and a naive idea of long-term relationships. Many young people believe that they can be together for their whole life with one person and never desire anyone else. Unfortunately, that's usually not the case. If you have a healthy sex-drive, you will eventually get interested in other people. This is not weird or sinful or fucked up or anything like that, it's natural. It's biology. Now, if you're as conservative about it as everyone else here, you have two choices: do it in secrecy (cheat) or chastize yourself, try to suppress the desire and forget about this urge to try out other people. Both options are not exactly desirable. This is why I believe open relationships are the best way to go. Everyone can have his/her freedom and doesn't need0