How do you deal with a disturbing life like mine? Is anybody going through a similar situation?

29, no girl, erectile dysfunction, broke, depressed, have a nerve disorder (Multiple sclerosis), no career, low confidence. Never will have a girl because of my quality in sex. She's gonna cheat on me anyway so I have escorts to pay to have sex every time. My quality of life is ultra low.

See nobody can help I have one of the worst lives ever


Most Helpful Girl

  • I disagree.

    You're quality of life is not ultra low. Your esteem is ultra low.

    Being honest, if your quality of life was ultra low you would be homeless, covered in fleas, no food or water or shelter, just a shell of a person. That's not the case.

    Don't get me wrong. You aren't the most blessed of dudes. But that doesn't mean you don't have a good heart and a kind nature.

    I'll tell you a story. I am depressed too, on medication. I struggle with my weight. I've been cheated on, abused, raped and almost a victim of a paedophilla ring.. And I have attempted suicide more than once. I've been an apprentice for 2 years to try and improve myself and I was so poor for 2 years I couldn't afford food. My boyfriend is a gamer who has been cheated on, abused, threatened, and went from woman to woman as one night stands because he thought nobody would accept him. He has a dead end boring job and very little social life. He approached me relentlessly and I'm very glad he did. He supported me through everything.

    With the right person you can both shine. He encourages me to sing, and I've encouraged him to the point he's taking a degree in an interest he only fantasized about.

    You can always improve, but the effort starts with you. You can't expect someone to stumble into your life if you aren't willing to accept them. To welcome them. To try for them. To love them. It sounds to me like you are so busy feeling sorry for yourself to better yourself.

    So instead of "see nobody can help me, I have the worst life ever, nobody can relate" no, nobody can relate to your exact situation but that doesn't mean that every one of us aren't struggling with our own issues. We all have pain, we all have torment, and unfortunately you were dealt a shit hand. But no girl finds self pity sexy. Get yourself help and support and make something of yourself that you can be proud of.

    • Thanks. I try I just don't want people to find out. I'm going to be more of a joke

    • That's why you don't tell them.

      I didn't open with my boyfriend, hey I've been raped! For me, being with him is a challenge; the person who raped me is a friend and his girlfriend has the same first name as me and the surname of my boyfriend. So if I married him I would have her name.

      The best thing for you, and me, to do is to go okay. I've had a shit hand dealt. But I'm going to get help and prove myself and be an example of what I can be. Don't be an example of pitiness. A girl will have so much more respect for you for trying, I guarantee it.

    • I feel you, thanks. God bless

Most Helpful Guy

  • How can you afford escorts or even perform if your broke and broken? There are drugs for those things

    • I take pills and can have an erection but not long. Girls want guys with stamina. I go broke because I pay. With a nerve disorder its much worse

    • Show All
    • Hopefully they will come out with new drugs to help with all those things in the near future, at least your still young enough where you may see that one day so don't give up

    • Or young enough to live longer with this

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • A good girl will care about you despite those things. I have mental health issues and because of my past of abuse, I'm not in school. I don't have a career even though I'm trying and I'm depressed. It is really difficult, but I do my best to get up, fill out more job applications, sign up for another dating website and listen to music. Day after day after day, the same thing. It's frustrating. But, if a girl just cheats on you because of your inability to have sex all the time, the she's not the right girl anyway. I would never cheat on a guy just because of that, I wouldn't cheat on a guy in the first place. I'm personally a very caring person, and I really hope you know that, there is a girl out there who will understand your life, and probably is also struggling with her own pain.

    Don't give up, and just remember to breath sometimes. I wish you luck and I wish I had better advice to give.

  • My cousin became paralyzed from the waist down after surviving meningitis at age 19 or 20. He can't walk or go to the bathroom on his own ever again. Not sure how it has sexually affected him, but I think he probably has problems there too. He falls in and out of depression, but he has a very strong support system and is working very, very hard on career (he is in medical school). He is absolutely amazing and courageous. I think your best bet is to work hard on finding a career that can make you happy and give a stable life financially. Surround yourself with a good support system and hobbies to build up your self- esteem and bring you happiness. You've had a very very tough life, and my heart goes out to you to have to deal with so much... but there are indeed women out there who would give you a chance especially if you fight hard to cheer up.

    I know it is easier said than done, but you've got only one life to live. If you focus on what you cannot do, the person who is harmed the most is you and you deserve to be happy.

  • Yeah you make it some bad! I am stuck to but for other reasons!


What Guys Said 3

  • Who cares if you're bad at sex when you pay them? Get a job, get the health insurance, talk to a therapist once a week, bang hookers, be honest with girls on some dating app and find someone relatable who won't judge you, and understand your situation isn't really that bad

  • It sounds like a confidence issue that you have. You simply need a new perspective on life. Sadly, you cannot change unless you want to actually change, so you should seek therapy on your low confidence, and depression. Once you've gotten that taken care of, you can focus on improving your broke status and career path, and be able to focus on your nerve disorder, and eventually you'll see that your erectile dysfunction with a healthy attitude, exercise, and medication can be improved vastly.

  • not at all, girls are always all over me