Disconnection from the self, and the world?

So, here's the basic story. I've always been introverted, for as long as i can remember, but I do have extravert qualities. The introverted side of me though usually wins in any given situation. Now though, i'm starting to realise just how far away from myself i really am, and from the world. I dont know who the real me is, there are so many faces to the dice and i can't tell which is really me. It's as if the real me is hidden inside the core, and whichever facade i adopt depends on my company/situation.

Because of this, and i've experienced this a lot having had to deal with an introverted brain, i am disconnected from my own mind. It feels as though i know nothing, whenvever something happens which i genuinely want to remember, or i find out something new and study up on it trying to create pathways in my head to get to it, it fails. It is like my brain in any situation which calls for a response from me says 'naah you dont know nothing on the topic', where i know i do, i just can't seem to access the information at all. Im constantly living in my own unconscous little world...

Spinning off from this, i've become disconnected from the world around me, i dont have any passion, i dont feel anything. Im just so numb to everything that's going on around me. I can't focus in uni (which is a big deal because its one of the best things I've done with my life), i can't enjoy the moment when im out somewhere. Nothing makes me happy, nothing makes me sad. I dont know who i am, i dont know what im doing, and even though i dont really feel anything about anything, this is actually getting to me as i know that this is my problem. I just have no idea how to fix it! It feels as though this is a defence mechanism but from what my brain is trying to defend against i have no idea...

does anyone out there have a similar problem? or a possible solution? :P

hhaah get ready for some thoreau !!! its gonna get crazy... :L


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What Guys Said 1

  • You just seem neutral in all sectors, I suggest you try and have fun and seek pleasure doing something to rekindle your senses. :')

    I have limited knowledge, because I can't relate to this situation.

    • Yeah its difficult to work with. I mean maybe its good that i realise what my problem is but how to fix it i dunno :P I can try this and see what happens! :D thanks for the comment sir! :')

    • Show All
    • hahah get ready for some Thoreau, its gonna get crazy.. :L

    • Sounds great. 😂

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