So, I am a rather shy guy at first untill i know someone better.
I have been in this situation a few times:

I really like someone but because i am shy it usually ends in just being friends ( nothing wrong with that honestly. ) but i'd just like to hear some opinions on what i could do to change this, as the girl won't make the first move either.

What would you do if you are shy and like a girl.
Girls; Would you ever make the first move, what would you do if you like a guy but he is too shy to do something?


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  • I've been very shy for much of my life and have experienced more rejection than most, if not outright ostracization. I just want you to know it 'does' get better. Here are a few lessons from my life to help speed you on your way:

    (I'm going to approach this from the idea you are a guy who places a lot of value on relationships. Your question makes me think that, in addition to sex, you really want something deeper with a girl you're attracted to. That's a good thing. Keep that, because you're going to have a lot of examples and voices telling you it's wrong.)

    -Rejection isn't rejection, it's dodging a bullet. Believe me when I say that you do 'not' want to end up in a relationship with someone you have to convince to be with you. Just ask and be just as thankful if they say "no" as if they said "yes." This is more important at your age when girls truly are girls and have some of the most vapid ideas about life and relationships.

    -Spend time to figure out who 'you' are and what you want in life. Until you know this, you can't accurately say what market you're actually in. If you absolutely 'know' that marriage and children are in your future, then you can really decide if someone's right for you or not. (If family is really important to you, you need to have your life together to support that. Either you need a lifestyle career, (i. e. military) or you need to sock money away and get a good-paying career/trade.)

    -To get over shyness, take up partner dancing. I've done ballroom for six years and it's done wonders. You'd be amazed at how much more confidence you have when you're not bothered at all to walk up to any woman at a dance party and ask her to dance. Plus, nearly all women love to dance. It sets you a step above and you can totally sell the idea of clearing the dance-floor at your school dances. ;)

    • Okay so first of all id really like to thank you for the time you took to reply to my question!
      And yes i consider myself to be the kind of guy that really values a relation.

      As in the past i have heard a "No" and the other times i was too shy to ask, I will try to look at rejection the way you described it.

      I have already had quite a lot of trouble with finding out who i am and what i want to do, I have had help clearing things out ( really appreciate what these people have done for me ) I am pretty sure this will change as i grow older tho as I am still pretty young, although I do have an idea of what i want in the future.

      I will definetly give it a try, But yeah i can't really dance that well :p :/

      Thanks again for the answer!

    • @iCurious That's the cool part about partner dancing, is that it's structured.

      Work on freestyle, too. Get a large mirror, watch videos, and just learn to be confident in who you are. Because, believe it or not, confidence is a skill.

      (Go to lowes and look at the sliding closet doors. You can get two 36" wide ones for like $100, which is super cheap by comparison.)

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