Why does my boyfriend wanna have a baby so bad?

My boyfriend is obsessed with this baby thing and it's making me feel a bit uncomfortable. He's 25 and I'm 23. We're still too young and I don't think he understands what being a father is all about. He just feels like he can make me pregnant and live like they see on television. Is this normal for men? Do they just suddenly have this urge to get a girl pregnant?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Simply explain to him that on your native planet, men and women get married, buy a house and bring themselves to a place of relative security prior to bringing children into the world.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Meh.

    Tell your boyfriend you aren’t ready to get pregnant and that you aren’t going to change you mind anytime soon. Find out why he wants a baby so badly.

    It’s possible that he might be worried you two will break up and he thinks having a baby will keep you together (which, by the way, is not a good reason.)

    Or maybe he just feels ready to take that step (also not fair to your life and priorities.) Either way, you need to be honest with him and tell him how you feel.

    If he still doesn’t drop it, then I’d consider ending things with him. No one, especially a boyfriend, should put so much pressure on you to do something you don’t want to do. That only shows that he cares more about what he wants than what you want, and that isn’t fair to you.



Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • The age his parents had kids, cultural norms, as well as pressure from peers to conform to their standard of living may be factoring into his decision to push for kids.

    A study on adolescent's expectations and desires about marriage and parenthood found that factors such as grades and schooling, ethnicity, and locus of control had a significant impact on one's attitude toward parenthood.

    He may be one or more of the following:
    1. Not a strong academic performer/doesn't have high academic aspirations.
    2. African American or Hispanic (in terms of actual births)
    3. Weak (external) locus of control (believes environment controls outcome).

    • Well, he's Hispanic... if that matters.

    • Does he aspire to climb the corporate ladder, or is he satisfied in his current position? Does he have a strong educational background?

  • You should probably start buying your own female condoms...

  • Too young? Not really...

    • We're too young by many standards.

    • Who's standards? If you can't afford it, then no you shouldn't have a child. But if you can, then yeah you should. But don't do it if he isn't the one.

  • Are all his friends having them

    • Yes all of his friends have kids.

    • Well he probably feels left out and his friends are probably all bragging about how amazing it is and bugging him about when he will get one

What Girls Said 1

  • I think it's normal for men to want to start families. You guys are kinda young to settle down, I would explain again how you aren't ready. Try to explain how unfair it would be to have a baby 'just cause it's cool on tv'