How do I stop feeling so insecure and compare myself to other women?

Hello :)
Thanks for reading my question. Here's the thing: I've been feeling very insecure lately. I keep comparing myself to other women and feeling jealous because maybe my boyfriend will find them more attractive than me. Lucky for me, my boyfriend gets me and understands this, he keeps reassuring me that I'm the one he wants, that I'm pretty and he's proud of me and he loves me and yes, there are other women, other beautiful women out there but I'm the one he wants. This makes me feel good for a while... but then I start to think back about a text he sent his friend (he texted his best friend "I saw X again today... mmmmmmmh xD she has a bit more belly now though"; this about a girl they both know for years and saw a lot in the gym, but the thought of him thinking and saying "mmmmm" about another girl still makes me feel insecure).

So long story short: how do I stop comparing myself to other women and feel so jealous?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I can't tell you how to make yourself feel better, but I can tell you that men rarely compare women. We either like how they look or we don't. Sure that girl might look good but the fact that is he's with you. Not her. You already won. And jealousy is really pointless. You two are together because you want to be. He could've left you for her but he didn't. All you can do is show him how awesome you can be and show him you love him. That's pretty much all one can do and hope for the best. If he leaves, you'll be losing an idiot and he'll be losing someone who loved him. Therefore - his loss, not yours.

    • Thanks a lot for your reply! You're right. When I told him about my insecurity, he also told me that, if he really wanted to be with one of them, he would be with one of them since he knows the girls I compare myself to way before he met me.

    • Show All
    • Than stop thinking about it. Think of the things you'd like to improve about yourself - physical or otherwise, make a list and get to work. I guarantee you the moment you start getting into shape your self esteem will skyrocket. Not to mention your boyfriend will be all over you because of the way you act more confident. Good luck :)

    • Thanks :)

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What Guys Said 3

  • Girl, you are beautiful and perfect in your own way. Every shape and form of the female form is beautiful and unique. Trying to compare your beauty to a other woman is like trying to compare The Mona Lisa and The Last Supper. Both are perfect in their own way, don't let anyone tell you different. ^_^

  • There's no real trick to doing this. You just need to start appreciating yourself a lot more... instead of picking on flaws, focus on what you like about yourself.

    • Thanks for your answer. I try to do that, but then I think: this or that girl I've seen has the same as me but better :/

    • Yeah, that will be the hardest part for you... learning to not focus on what others have.

  • you are wired to hate other women dont fight your nature... .


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