Does my fiction story sound good to you?

On a cool, moon illuminated night I stare up at the stars against the grimy, chilled brick on the side of some hole in the wall bar and I take a drag from my cigarette, trying to keep my exposed body warm. I always stare up at the stars hoping for something magical to happen before I am forced to work. I work about every day it's hard to live out here on these streets. After all a girl has got to pay her bills.

As I'm standing I can hear two girls cackling down the street. I know those voices from anywhere and its none other than Candy and Becky. They look pretty happy and with the outfits their wearing I know they just left the club. I see Becky wearing a bedazzled eye patch, to be truthfully honest she looks like Patchy the Pirate. They stare at me for a long time and I just roll my eyes. "How's your eye Becky?" I smile devilishly. She looks at me gaped and walks a little faster with Candy trailing behind her. I used to be friends with Candy until she double crossed me. If you try to cross me trust me I will get even, by any means necessary.

The story is called The Tale of Marcie's Unfoldings

I haven't written the summary yet. I haven't been inspired but its a story about a bad girl that is living a bad life and it leads to her going into prostitution and then its downhill from there.

if you want to read the rest it's on my wattpad:

Thanks :)


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What Guys Said 2

  • So, this'll be a dark story then? If so, I'd make it a bit more morbid... maybe her waking up in a cold dark room/cell (Battered and bruised) with other prostitutes in a hostel somewhere in a place like Serbia or in the hands of the Russian mafia and she has to do unspeakable things just to survive and not end up in a river or ditch etc. (At least thats how I'd probably start it. Then she tells her story of how she got there, and what she's gonna do to get out.) Don't hold back make it gritty, show the truly dark side of prostitution and where it can lead you. I like the story so far... but don't hold back... it'll be worth it.

  • Eh its not good if doesn't have rhyming in it.


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