If someone thinks you can't do something are they judgmental or right?

That's the interesting question.

Sometimes someone looks down on you because they think you can't do something, but the reality is maybe you really cannot do something.

So is there even a point in trying to defy them? I mean of course they're an asshole for being judgmental, but I do wonder if it doesn't change the fact that they're right.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Well if you cannot do it then I think there's boundaries between receiving constructive criticism or plain insults. Ask them - is it possible that you could show me how to do it so I can familiarise myself with what is involved.

    • Yeah most of it is insults not criticism. Also a lot of these people have no right to judge me to begin with. They're not paying my tuition so what gives them the right to even have an opinion?

    • Exactly. just laugh say haha you funny with a frown. Give as good as it gets. Or just stick your middle finger up that's what I would do lol I'm in the process of getting ready for university after endless attempts to kick start a career

What Girls Said 2

  • Is there a point in trying to defy someone who thinks you can't do something?
    It depends if they hold these views because you really can't/shouldn't, or if they're just being judgmental.

    For example, if you're 13, you shouldn't be driving yourself to school. For the sake of your own safety, as well as those around you.

    • More like if someone thinks you're not smart enough to do something is there a point in trying to prove them wrong?

      Sometimes I feel like... studying is not easy. It's difficult to study something you don't genuinely like.

      And then it becomes a question of is this person not smart enough when it really is more about that person not liking the material to begin with.

      It's a complicated issue.

      I withdrew from hard core business school and I know most people thought even when I was enrolled that I couldn't do it. My own parents thought that.

      I suffered so much pain as a consequence of doing that because then everyone started treating me badly.

      I've always wondered whether I did something wrong and it was okay for everyone to underestimate me, or if I did the right thing by withdrawing because I didn't like it there.

    • oh okay regarding the business school thing.. I get how that must be tough. To feel like you proved everyone right in their thoughts that you weren't capable of finishing the business degree/course when in reality, you are capable. It was simply bad timing, too much at once, etc..

      Regardless, I think you did the right thing. It's good to use people who underestimate you as motivation to work harder and reach your goals. However, only to a certain degree. Making sure your own health/happiness in life is kept as a higher priority than proving other's wrong is important to remember. Like... imagine if you did stay in business school and complete it, proving everyone wrong, but losing your own sanity at the same time.
      Everything comes with a sacrifice.

  • Depends on how they say it.
    I wouldn't take offense to it unless they say it in a rude way.. you know with that certain attitude and eye contact.. and that tone.