Is this silly of me?

I get very excited to try new things with my SO. Like new places to eat, new movies to see... just new things that we can do together.

And he always is asking me to do things and I always say yes because I enjoy spending time with him and he starts off making it sound all cool and fun and then he drops that he's already done whatever it is or been there.

And all the wind goes out of my sails. Like... it'll be a new experience for me, sure, but it'll be old and boring for him and the knowledge that we're not sharing this new experience just takes all the fun out of it for me. Immediately.

He just asked me to see a movie that's in theaters and then goes, "I've already seen it but..."

Why the heck would you invite me to a movie that you've already seen? I won't enjoy it as much. Like... I wasn't good enough to invite to do it the first time you went or save it for something we could experience the first time together then what's the point of going at all?

And obviously this goes deeper than just a movie. It extends to trips and vacations and just all this stuff. And I feel like the fun is sucked out of everything because I know he has already experienced whatever it is so his enjoyment or excitement isn't as genuine. And it feels like he's leading me around through these experiences and not actually having them WITH me. On the other hand, when I know this is a new experience for both of us... I find it like a million times better. Doesn't matter what it is. It's a million times more enjoyable than it would have been otherwise.

I don't want someone to lead me through life. I want someone to do life with me.

I'm probably being silly. But... do I at least make some sense?


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What Girls Said 3

  • sounds fine to me

  • Talk to him about this and I'm sure he will actually understand. Next time why don't you suggest a place or thing you guys can do that's new for you both and while you're doing it, keep emphasizing how much you enjoy experiencing new things together.

  • ugh this is a stupid question.