Why do some people feel as though they are entitled to the "perfect" person when they themselves aren't perfect?

I'm not saying that you can't fantasize about the perfect person loving you or anything.. but why do some people think that they deserve perfection just for existing? Why do you think this is?

  • They are full of themselves/narcissistic
    Vote A
  • They don't think in terms of reality/they're in a dreamworld
    Vote B
  • Both of the above
    Vote C
  • Another reason (please explain)
    Vote D
  • I wouldn't know the answer if it hit me in the face in the form of a rock.
    Vote E
Select age and gender to cast your vote:
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Most Helpful Guy

  • In my personal opinion, I try not to feel "entitled" to the perfect person, but still remain hopeful that I'll find the perfect person for my individual self. By this I mean someone whose traits compliment mine and help me (and my partner) grow into better, stronger and happier versions of ourselves. Included with this is the universal desire for my subjective perception of ultimate beauty to be met, which may be unrealistic, but I feel it is felt equally by both genders. I admit my standards may be a little higher than I have any right for them to be, but we should all have high standards when it comes to finding a suitable long-term partner I think.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • They don't have a good grasp on themselves or what they really want in a relationship. Sometimes they look for perfect to avoid intimacy all together.

    I was in a committed relationship with someone like this and had to end it overtime. Nice guy to everyone and good intentions. But as I had to take time away from running to spend with him I gained 4 pounds and he noticed.

    He was so stuck on himself and accomplishments. His accomplishments were his Dad paying the down ona house in 200& and gifting him ownership in rental properties.

    He is still to this day working the job he landed at internship and hasn't been promoted or made a difference.

    He's also overweight but barely 6'0 tall which is his only win.

    He has a boyfriend w Benefits that he should marry, she's awesome and in love with him. But she is 15 pounds overweight so he won't even consider it. She makes six figures.

    All you can do is be sad for them and move on.

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    • i hate that type the most. so glad you left when you did. :/

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 30

  • Most people have being brainwashed from a young age, by movies, books, society that there is Mr/Mrs perfect for us. When really that's not reality. Reality is not everyone is perfect.

    The real problem is not people think they are entitled to the perfect person, the problem is people don't want to accept reality of this world, what people are really like.

    The other problem is we let our imagination get the better of us, and imagination is not reality. We think we will be happy, with the nice car, the nice house, , the beautiful women, but again that;s not reality, because we do have all those things, life will give you more problems, to make you unhappy. That's when people turn to alcohol,, drugs etc, because they can't handle the stresses of life.

    Life in general is not easy, no matter who you are, rich. poor, beautiful, handsome, ugly. Everyone has their problems.

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    • What it comes down to with people, everyone really is just searching for happiness. But happiness won't find you, with the perfect partner or anything else.
      You have to choose to be happy.

  • Because we are brainwashed by what we see on tv/media. All these love stories and chick flicks the past 40 years are written by people who have unrealistic mindsets.
    A perfect person is falling in love with them for their flaws.
    Its normal to fall in love by attraction but if you can fall in love at their worst then, its golden. So I guess "perfect" is you excepting certain things they can't help and loving them for what they are.

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  • Well for me im guilty of being picky with my future partner even though i have some demons in my closet. Point being that depending on the intent.

    Bad intent is when the person is high maintenance but person themselves are poor or personality ain't so sharp.

    Good intent when you suffered to be wiser, stronger and etc you want an equal or opposite to help you. Not a dumb, weak, broke person that can't help you.

    Sorri if im not making sense but some do it for bad reasos others for good.

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  • it's human nature to be hypocritical in behavior. lucky most people learn to settle for something realistic after several attempts to find something perfect.

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  • Stupidity or maybe they need a wakeup call... a dose of reality.

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  • Both narcissism and livin in some dream world.. Although nobody is perfect, so I don't know who would think they could get a perfect person. LOL..

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  • probably just immaturity/ need to realize that no human being is perfect

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  • All of us were born perfect the way we were born, aside from societies microscope telling us otherwise.

    With that said, I do believe there is a thing such as "Perfection" in terms of relationships, but it is not based on being perfect. When a couple compliment each other in virtually every way, that is perfection. Each has what the other wants and needs. Each helps and supports the other's growth.

    To find the "perfect" person requires absolute honesty and time. Do I like her because she is cute, or does she exhibit traits that compliment my wants and needs? Do she feel the same about me?

    The more experience one has with finding the "perfect" person, the more they realize that, unless the inside (heart) compliments the outside (looks), then the person is far from the "perfect" person. Never allow the traits that excite you to blind you from seeing the whole person.

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  • I don't expect anything more from my partner than I expect from myself.
    But truth be told, I'm damn near perfect.

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  • I've seen some guys on here, usually anonypuss, who say they won't even touch a woman who isn't a perfect ten. I just laugh because I get my dick wet almost every day and I'm certain he's fucking his hand.

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  • Because they just think so. That's about it.

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  • I deserve perfect because I can maintain perfection. I care about people, especially the ones I love.

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  • This is a really large and heavy question. I'll just put that I know that I don't deserve nor want a "perfect" gal. That would be boring to me.

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  • I couldn't tell you.
    I mean, I know I'm not perfect. And I don't expect anyone else to be.

    I've got clinical depression and anxiety. And I've been single for nearly 10 years. Nobody wants anything to do with me.

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  • Everyone has their own concept of perfect. Everyone has their own deal breakers. Mine were promiscuous women. Another person might be nothing less than a 9. Looks are #5 on my list. You can ask or want anything. Doesn't mean you are going to get it.

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  • I think people set their standards too high and aren't realistic in terms of finding the "perfect" person.

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  • it's what is perfect to them-looks and personality wise. say i want a strong, gamer who understands my humor, and likes movies as well as my music-that would be perfect for me

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  • No one is perfect... everyone have some imperfections..

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  • What makes a person perfect? There is no perfect. It's more subjective than anything else. And a majority of human beings want what they can't have.

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  • I'm perfect :)

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  • Cuz we want someone to be our idea of perfection

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  • No one in this world is perfect even if you found someone perfect..

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  • most women at my college are like this.

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  • some can actually get that perfect lover
    others are delusional

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  • im entitles to the best of everything in the world!!!

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  • Because someday machines will take over the world and none of this will matter.

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  • that is so me except that i am perfect in my own way and everyone is.

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  • We always want something better than ourselves

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  • Some people have a fantasy of some super model with a perfect personality then they fall in love with the thought and expect it to happen without caring at all what the perfect person wants for their standards

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  • I think it's related to porn and the internet. And movies. And our brain and other bulls hit.

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What Girls Said 11

  • It depends. Do they fit the standards they hold for themselves? I don't consider myself perfect. But don't need a person who doesn't respect my values and beliefs if they don't want to uphold that for themselves. This is why I'm not dating, never did, and more so never will. Because I don't have time to continue dealing with heartache. If it's a physical thing, of course, it's immaturity. But things like morals: waiting till marriage to have sex and sexual activity, getting married period, etc shouldn't be an issue if that person really liked you. This is all I was looking for. And it's always an issue every time. And the crazy part? I wasn't even looking to date anybody or chase after a guy. It's all the guys that I rejected and they rejected back that was chasing me. But meanwhile, I get told my standards are too high and nobody can meet them. I find it as an excuse for them to do what they want until somebody has a problem.

    Sometimes, those same people do what to have a better person, and that's okay. Everybody is entitled to that. But they have to be able to change and want to change for themselves to not only attract such a person but to actually be the right kind of person they are attracted to needs. If they're selfish, it won't matter. They'll fail at any relationship. Everything is a choice.

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    • I'm sorry. I hope you find a guy that holds the same values as you, if you still want them. Sounds like dating is a piece of work. 😕

  • In my 16 years of existence, I've realized we've all heard of fairytales as kids. Of stories about how life sucked so bad to nice and deserving people yet they end up having the perfect, happy ending with the handsome prince.

    We as people knows that life isn't perfect, there will be an evil queen/ stepmother/ or some sea monster that wants to steal your voice so could have feet. In every Disney story that I've watched, I thought everything was annoying, that the person who deserves something big, something genuine and something really nice gets mistreated by the villains. Guys might think of how villains in Batman shows are so annoying and the fight is hard but the victory awaits.

    Modern media, classic tales, cultural beliefs and many other things made us believe that life can be hard, AND IT WILL BE. We will have dreams- a dream girl or guy that we will end up with in the end. A perfect life.

    And we keep on trying to pursue that dream. It's not like we're narcissistic, it's that we were born into a world where there is no pain, no gain.

    But as we grow older we realize that life, doesn't always end perfectly for everyone. But life may end good. Can be bad. We may end up with some short, brunette with a cute smile instead of a tall blonde Czech beauty. And see that person as the most perfect woman ever. Another lesson here is that people might have expectations, but WE ADAPT. We UNDERSTAND. And most of all, the best thing about us that makes us accept whoever we are with, is
    WE LOVE.

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  • Either they are narcissistic and believe that they're perfect even though they're not, or they have a unrealistic view of how dating works. Or they simply have not even bothered to look at themselves and consider what "league" they are in.

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  • I vote C with additional concerns to the parents who raised them with little to no rules or restrictions, or top of spoiling them or telling them that they always deserved the best.

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  • For me the perfect person would just be someone that is always there for me and makes me a better person. They don't have to be flawless, because an actual perfect human being would be boring.

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  • perfection is subjective. what i see as perfect, you might not even be attracted to... so why does it matter?

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  • I said "other" because I think the media sets people up to have "the best" and also because I think they're somewhat insecure and the meaning of the best way to avoid a real relationship. Also I think so people are just being honest about what they want.

    I have to admit, I'm not in great shape but I was married to a guy who was in horrible shape and it was a real turn-off, so now I only want guys in great shape. But I know that won't happen until I get thin and fit, which is realistically never so I just don't date.

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    • I said "other" because I think the media sets people up to have "the best" and also because I think they're somewhat insecure and demanding only the best is a way to avoid a real relationship. Also, I think some people are just being honest about what they want.

  • when people say that they mean the perfect person for them, they understand that once they find that person they will still have flaws.

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  • They probably watch too many movies

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  • They are full of themselves/narcissistic

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  • Self obsession is a disease Bae.

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