What do you think about pushing your SO to perform well in academics? What would you think if your SO does that to you?

Basically tiger momming him a bit lol... Like telling him to practice his subject more, do extra courses in it etc etc
If not academics, what do you think of pushing your SO to perform well at workplace?
Would you like it if your SO does it to you?
What you think of that?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Shows me they care about my well-being and my success in life. Also, if we plan on being a "couple" for a while, financially, it would be in both our best interest if my partner was doing well in their studies to be able to acquire a financially better career.

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    • However, if the support is more of a nagging, that would piss me off. Then I would be more like you are mothering me than trying to support me, which annoys the hell out of me. I have one mother, I don't need more than this.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 23

  • I think that is fine, and everyone should do it, and everyone should be open to receiving it!!! Love doesn't pay the bills!!! You want a nice life? Sorry, but nice things cost money! You want money? Yes, then you need a good job! So, it is only fair and should be expected to be with someone who has a future you can count on. Not fair to be stuck with a dead-beat you have to support because they are a flake and a party head drop out. So it should be ok to make sure the person you are with is going to work out as a good life partner in ways other than sex, companionship, and sole mates, but also a good financial contributor too!!!

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  • it's always good to encourage our partners to do their best. it just has to be balanced with not being heavy handed

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  • I personally think that at your age there's not too many other things, short of saving his life, that I can think of to show your love for him. But you're also at that age where you'll get so much negative feedback talking about you trying to control him. If he is already passing his courses then nothing needs to be said. If he's not, then he needs the encouragement and the pat on the back.

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  • I would never push her to do anything more like give her advice and help her if she asks. My job is to support and encourage her, not stress her out.

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  • Depends on the individual.

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  • Basically it is a dynamic within a relationship whether it is right or wrong first look at how both people react. If there are issues 90% of people will speak out or end relationship

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  • Career success depends more on EQ (interpersonal skills) than IQ.
    Other people of any sort even husbands, are not clay to be moulded in whatever shape you think they should have.

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    • Sorry, skipped part 2 of your post. She tries that on me she's history. Bridges burnt.

  • I don't believe in pushing people in doing better at their jobs or academics. They're working under certain dynamics that we don't control. I might push them to get better at some personal goals where all variables are under their control.

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  • I think that's caring. If you really wanna motivate him, reward him if he get good results. The reward can be anything, something you think will motivate him and is reasonable. His favorite dinner? Cake? Computer game? Do his part of the household chores? Movie? Travel? Netflix and chill? Chill without Netflix? ;)

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  • Encouragement can be good if they are trying or want to do better. But if they are happy with their role at work or their education path, it can just backfire. What is good for one person is not good for another.

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  • Encouraging him to do well would be good. Nagging would not be.

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  • Hate it. I don't need a piece of paper from a school that rips people off and puts them in debt to tell me I understand economics and finance.

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  • I like a woman to be an enthusiastic, positive motivator. Just make it a point to be conscious of his feelings and the fact that we don't all operate at the same speed or even in the same way.

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  • Encourage, sure. But beyond that, no.

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  • It's fine to be supportive, but that sounds like being excessive and treating someone like a child. Don't date someone who doesn't meet your criteria and try to mold them into something they're not

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  • I just think it's cute if my S. O cares as long as it's not to the point of calling me bad

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  • So means?

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  • Supportive yes, pushing no

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  • I do think it is important to motivate them, but be careful, nobody wants a second mom

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  • sounds like a very selfish idea

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  • I push myself every day

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  • I think there pushing. Me towards greatness

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  • motivating eachother is a good thing

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What Girls Said 10

  • I think it is a good thing to encourage your SO to do well, to try to inspire them and support them. But I don't think that pushing or pressuring is healthy. It's their life, those are their choices to make. If they want to take a class or not take a class, that's up to them.

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  • I think it should be encouraging rather than pushing. Pushing may get you a backlash, which may scupper the whole reason for the push. Encouragement is more likely to get results. That is how I was brought up. Make sure they understand the "Knowledge is King"!

    My boyfriend and I encourage each other. We both know this next 6 months or so are critical.

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  • Yea i often push him to get to work/school on time and to get good grades but he's gonna do what he wants

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  • you can never push anyone, especially not your SO.

    you can make a hidden suggestion but that's all.

    your SO is not with you to have someone else (beside the family, coworkers, teachers...) to boss over him/her. you're their escape from stress.

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  • Its nice to be encouraging, but thats overbearing. I wouldn't like it, nor would I do it. It would increase the pressure, and make the relationship less fun.

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  • depends. some guys appreciate that. some guys see it as "not accepting them as they are." loool.

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  • I think you shouldn't do that you aren't his mother, I personally wouldn't do it and would get upset if my SO did that to me.

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  • I would appropriateit

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  • I don't mind if they're supporting and trying to be helpful in their own way. But I'd hate if they were nagging me.

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  • Be encouraging and motivating but don't put pressure on him. Pressure is the worst thing there is to perform well in academics.

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