Do I keep the baby or not?

ok... i’m pregnant. it’s my boyfriends baby, and neither of us are in the right state of mind for a baby. he’s been begging to marry me and have a baby and all this, but i just don’t feel ready. i’ve told him this. i also know that if i tell him i want an abortion, he’ll hate me. i don’t know what to do.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • Don't avoid telling him just because he will be mad. This is a life changing decision and nobody wants you to do the wrong thing out of fear.

    If you aren't ready I'd say abort or put the kid up for adoption, there's no shame in it no matter what your boyfriend says to you

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  • I would personally keep the baby. But if you guys really don't feel ready? Then I would put the baby up for adoption rather than get an abortion. But that's just my opinion

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    • 3d

      i don’t want my boyfriend to know though.

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    • 3d

      i feel like i’m betraying the baby.

    • 3d

      you can make it work if u really want to.

  • You said that neither of you are in the right state of mind for a baby. Abort it. If you give birth to it he won't let you put it up for adoption.

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  • Put the baby up for adoption. I'll pray everything works out for y'all.

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  • He wants YOU and the baby is only a way to get you and tie you to him.

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    • 3d

      Wait, what? Unless he purposefully messed up with her contraception, trapping her with him with a baby is NOT the reason she got pregnant.

    • 2d

      @Alex31 giving a show putting on a condom, but taking it off behind her back...

What Girls Said 8

  • You need to do what is best for you.

    This happened to me when I was 21

    I tried to be happy about it for his sake but I quickly wound up trapped in a self destructive, suicidal and borderline homicidal state of rage.

    Don’t compromise your wellbeing for fear of hate.

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    • 3d

      thank you. this is the only opinion so far that’s really helped. i appreciate it.

    • 3d

      I’m glad I could help.

      This is a tough situation and it’s pretty hard to find people who understand.

  • I think I'll never be ready for a baby until I actually have it. A lot of great people got born when their parents weren't ready. I think when you do have him, you will be thankful you didn't abort him. Especially that the abortion would cost you your relationship. And you are 28, objectively you should be ready, I mean, I bet you are not starving, you are healthy, you have money, so on. Have the kid.

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    • 3d

      Oh. I just read you are 19. Keep the baby if your parents are supportive.

  • i think you should put the baby up for adoption if your not ready

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  • So you have support, a man who wants to be with you and you still want an abortion? Do you think he got you pregnant on purpose? If not I would strongly consider keeping the baby.
    Keep in mind it is quite possible you’ll have a miscarriage in the first 12 weeks anyway.
    I miscarried when i was 17.

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  • Keep it.
    If you weren’t ready then you shouldn’t have been engaging in activity that would potentially produce something you aren’t ready for.
    You say he wants to marry you and if that man is willing to step up to the plate then keep your baby.

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  • keep the baby.

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  • Yes. You had sex. You are an adult, so you know sex can lead to pregnancy, yet you don’t seem to have had any problems being ready to have sex. Now you woman up and take care of your child, or leave your baby in the care of its father, who obviously want it. If neither of you had wanted it then you give the child up for adoption so somebody else can do what’s supposed to be your job of raising and loving this kid.

    You’re 28, nearly 30 for god’s sake. Grow up. You’re not 12 anymore.

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  • Grow up you aren't a teenager anymore you are almost hitting 30 . You didn't used protection take responsibility like an adult would. Now if you are pregnant who's fault is that? If you were 16 years old okay I would understand more the situation. How is it possible that grown old ass woman at you're age not have life and your shit together. Actually you know what the baby is better of if you give it to a 40 year old, Yes at least give it to someone that is welcome financially establish. I am not married, I don't kids but I am 25 years old I own a home and I have 2 degrees and own two retails businesses, How is possible that someone my age that's younger than you makes more money then an old woman like you. Grow up will you!

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    • 3d

      hhah tell her sis

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    • 3d

      I believe it's on your settings.

    • 3d

      ok thanks

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