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I feel like people don’t like me and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong?

Anonymous
I feel like people don’t like me and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I’m nice and I try to socialize, even though I’m really bad at small talk & connecting to people. I’ve been rejected by most people all my life and it gives me anxiety. I have no self confidence because people make me feel like a burden.

When the few friends I have are reminiscing, they always talk about fun moments they’ve had without me. When I wasn't even invited. And I hear about them it for the first time.
And when I do go out with them, they are always “too tired” or they have an excuse to leave early. When I ask them about it, they say nothing is wrong with me and it’s just coincidence. But it’s been “coincidence” for 10 years now..

I feel like I missed out on a lot in my life and it’s not getting better. The older I get, the worse. I don’t expect everyone to like me, but I haven’t even made 1 new friend in 5 years. And the people I try to connect with (friends of my boyfriend, co-workers,..), don’t put any effort into me. But when they want to complain about their lives/problems, they contact me. When I have something on my mind, they suddenly have no time or they start talking about themselves.
Even a couple of psychologists told me I had to leave, because “I was too old for them” or “There were too many patients”, so they threw me out.

I go to events when people invite me. When I tell something they act uninterested. When I’m in a group, people don’t notice me. While I don’t think I’m THAT awful to be around. Friendship matters more to me than anything. It seems like genuine friends are so rare these days. If I befriend someone, I put a lot of time and effort into it.

What can I do? It’s making me feel depressed and lonely.. Thank you for listening. I needed to get this off my chest
I feel like people don’t like me and I don’t know what I’m doing wrong?
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