Have you ever prematurely judged someone or wrote them off and then later you found them to actually be a good person after all?

[TurboKid]

Frequently, although I'm a skeptic in general. I don't trust my own judgments. My most confident beliefs still often have around a 10% degree of uncertainty to which I assign them. I make judgments to help navigate the world since I wouldn't be able to get anything done if I was filled with paralyzing doubts about everything.

So I don't have very powerful and firm judgments. I always have doubts about all of them, and they're frequently wrong and I change my mind a lot about things.

It's like if it's dark and I see a silhouette of a small animal moving about in the shadows, I form the judgment that it's probably a raccoon. Yet I only assign around a 50% degree of confidence. It just seems the most likely since there are raccoons in the area. Yet if I have time to investigate, I might be wrong (although not so surprised by it) and find out that it's actually a possum.

I tend to change my mind a lot as a result. Multiple people have accused me of being a "flip-flopper" on subjects since my mind on subjects tends to change with passing seasons. Yet I think it's a misunderstanding to accuse me of flip-flopping since I never claimed the highest degree of certainty with my opinions. I'm often careful to try to qualify them with phrases like, "To the best of my understanding, [...]" or "I believe from what I know so far that [...]", or "It seems to me like [...]" Sometimes I do get a bit hasty though and forget to qualify things and maybe I'm miscommunicating the degree of confidence to which I hold such assumptions since I never hold any to the point of absolute certainty.

[Sonorous]

I don't tend to harshly judge people very quickly unless they give me strong reasons to do so. And even still, I like to make a clear distinctions between the person's character and their personality.

So, let's say I don't like how someone is acting. Sure, a bad personality can an extremely good marker of a bad character. But it's not always the case. So if I really cared, I'd find clear reasons for them having more of a good character than a bad one. Even though their personality sucks.

And if I could find reasons, then I won't view them as a bad person entirely. I'd still be able to respect aspects of them, I just wouldn't want to hang around them. So generally, unless the person is blatantly malevolent. I just like saying a person isn't good for me to be around. Or they aren't good for certain favored outcomes in life.

[crazyish]

I have a hard time judging others especially before getting to know them. Even when I've heard bad things about them, I still see the good in people and believe that everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt. I'm far from perfect and have no right to judge others.

[Apple1996]

That very rarely happens. I dont judge anyone too hard at the beginning and also I can read people's vibes extremely easily so if there is something off I'll notice right away but it stays in the back of my mind till later.

[Dragonpurple]

I often say first impressions are rarely right. As someone who somehow comes across with bad first impressions, I have found lots of people often judge me bad but as they get to know me find out they were wrong.

A first impression is really mostly just judging someone by their looks, mannerism and how they talk. You really can't know more than that without taking the time.

An example, 20 years ago... I applied for a job, was told I wasn't the right fit for it... this was through a temp agency. A different temp agency called me about a job, happened to be the exact same job... the main company used two different temp agencies for their recruiting needs.

I got the job, was hired on permanent after a probationary period. The funny thing was, the first temp agency called me back a few months later... like yeah, we think you might actually fit this job after all... then I told them I already got hired on permanent through the other temp agency.

The main company gave bonuses for employees hired on permanently and the first one lost out all of this, all cause they judge me too fast on too little information.

[NathanDavis]

Hmmm... what I've done is, to "avoid" certain people because of their bad vibes, but I didn't dismiss them, then later when I had to be involved with them I just got to know them better and of course I realize that they're not as bad or better said, entirely bad.

But they still have that shitty thing about them... lol. So my "gut" wasn't wrong, it's just that people are much more than just one thing, and sometimes you have to get over that.

As for the true asshats out there, I still keep them at a distance.

[ChrisMaster69]

A bit like response to another question, I don’t tend to prejudge people, if anything I am too open and simply expect people to be as they are.

in real life I have done this, don’t like you thing but then got on well, usually it’s the other person not liking me (I am a twat) but then realising I am a nice twat (at times).

on GaG, not sure it’s more of I thought they seemed okay, then just meh.

I would put money on a lot simply wrote me off and blocked, did not chat etc, not that worried but it’s likely how I come over at times lol.

Being a Geordie (ask a Brit) and English means I do come over ‘loud’ with limited volume, that’s just how I am and is really how people from Newcastle are 😂

[DizzyDesii]

A few celebs. I usually write them off for accepting certain roles. But then i realize theyre nothing like that role. Still, money isn't everything and they look sus when they play the roles of racists, rapists, pedos, terrorists, etc. Like i feel i could never trust them if i met em

[lakotabebebe]

Yes! This is actually how I got to understand my best friend! At first I was really annoyed about our differences, but over time I found out WHY we are different.

[MCheetah]

A mix of B and C. I don't judge people negatively until they give me at least two "negatives"/red flags to have sufficient evidence for. Saying one thing could be a joke or a lapse of judgment they could not hold true or dear to their core values. But if I hear two things that make them seem like a sh*tty person and/or an idiot, then I write them off after that (which sadly, happens more often than not). I voted B.

[PaynefulPleasures]

I'm so embarrassed but yes 😧

[Inexpensivefurniture]

I have pretty good intuition. If I get a bad feeling about someone, sooner or later I'm proven right. If anything I think my problem is that I'll get a bad vibe from someone, decide I'm being paranoid, and try to give them the benefit of the doubt. And then they end up proving my initial gut feeling right down the road

[purplepoppy]

They say you shouldn't judge a book by its cover but you'd. be an idiot to pick up a cookbook thinking it's a novel.
I find people show their true colour pretty quickly.

[Ninani]

Of course I make an assumption at the beginning, but I always give the benefit of doubt until I've gotten to know them better.

[SpiderManFan2002]

Yeah, when I was younger I was often quite quick to jump to conclusions about people. But that taught me from a young age, don’t judge anyone without getting to know them.

[devilish-cutie]

rrely as i usually am good at reading people. if anything i made more mistakes thinking people are better than they are, i usually aways give a chance untill they prove me othervise

[NamerOfStars]

Yes- but discovering that someone is a better person than you gave them credit for is actually a good feeling. Learning that your pessimism was unwarranted is a good thing- if you're intellectually honest enough to admit it.

[Agape93]

Yeap once and I regret that. Sorry tony! I misjudged you back when we first talked on here

[Éhmîë]

I tend to observe a lot. I don't just rush in to judge people cos they might not easily show their real self. Often times, when u're close friends with a person, u tend to know who he or she really is

[menina]

When I judge a person 99.9% of the times I'm right. I can tell whether someone is worth my time or not.

[collie22]

yeah I've done that , often i need to remind my self not to judge

[Toast792]

It's usually more of a mental 'something's up with this person', then 'maybe I was wrong..' then 'Nope, there it is. 🙄'

[Account]

Maybe when I was a teenager. But I can't recall anything right now.

[exitseven]

I can usually spot a jerk. It's one of my superpowers.