So I come from a family picnic with our two daughters back home. My husband didn't want to go because he hurt his foot but he managed to go out the night before and partied! He came back home and partied some more with his friends. So I came back home late afternoon. I left the sleeping kids in the car in the garage so I can get help from him because he was not answering the phone. Only to find a black purse in the family room, so when I was going up the stairs, he came down and asked what I doing. He had the guiltiest face in the world, and I was what are you doing. Then I ran upstairs and there was a naked girl was running to the third floor to the bathroom and locked herself there. So I yelled and screamed and ran back down to my daughters to leave but my husband comes outside with his underwear and manages to take my youngest (1 1/2) out of a moving vehicle. I was very emotional and just wanted my daughter back, I came back through the front of the house, but they all left! I was in tears, I just wanted her back, that's all I cared about. I called and he said he is coming back and wanted to talk, I had no strength but he kept on telling me that he didn't sleep with her or have his d*** sucked just that they kissed and if I didn't come home that they would have sex. He kept on apologizing and saying that he spoke about me the whole night. I really don't care at this point about him. I just wanted to leave but stayed because of the girls. I feel it is a bad decision & trying to heal. Is there a way for me to have prevented this? I am so hurt and betrayed. He said it was the alcohol and other drugs and he will stop everything and needs my help. I just don't believe him. I know that I am great person and I would never betray him like that. How do I move forward?
Most Helpful Girl
Please don't feel obligated to stay with him because of the children. You owe it to them to be the best parent you can be to them and that is intrinsically tied to your happiness. You can both be parents to your children without being married.
However the decision to divorce your husband is a choice all your own and based on numerous things. Everyone makes mistakes we are only human but He's already planted the seed of doubt in your mind and in all likely hood you may never be able to trust him. What is a relationship without trust? You've alluded to a possible drug and alcohol problem which is dangerous to you and your children. But addiction is a genuine illness and if he is truly suffering from addiction and he wants help then it is quite possible to work through this and come out of this situation stronger than ever. but in my opinion his cheating doesn't appear to be the actions of a addict out of control. His actions seem very much so deliberate and well thought out. He chose to bring this woman to your home at a time he knew you and your children wouldn't be there for a significant period of time.
To move forward I would suggest that you separate. Definitely abstain from having sex with him because his infidelity can be a real risk to your health. Give yourself time to sort through the situation consider what you want as much as you consider what's best for your children. Best of luck.