How can I tell a guy I have a boyfriend, without hurting him??

Before I met my guy, I met him, he told me he like me as I did, but we when out hanging and chatting and a lot of places together, and in all that time he never did anything, even though I gave him plenty of chances. Then I met the guy I'm with right now, I fell head over heals and I adore him, BUT I don't want to hurt the other one I love hanging out and talking, he became like my best friend.

What can I do?

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14

Most Helpful Guy

  • First of all, you should have notify him before dating the new guy. I think this is your fault that causes the awkwardness of the current situation. If you told him that would motivated him to take some action.

    But now, PLEASE be direct to him. DON'T hurt him ANYMORE by being indirect. If I were him, I would like to be told directly about the situation. And if you want to do a favor for your best friend, tell him about the plenty chances you gave him and point out that he didn't use them, so you found out he doesn't like to go for more.

    This way:

    1) you made him aware of his miss-behavior; maybe this is his way of expressing interest and he thinks doing fine, but obviously it is wrong and a good friend is the one who give the feedback to him. With thanks to you he'll be more brave about the next girl whom he would attracted to.

    2) He'll understand his fault and won't blame you for everything. (except the "not-telling")

    3) No one knows about the future! maybe some day you two get back to each other. Knowing that you both were attracted to each other in some time, could be great at that possible future! (Oh! I'm sorry if this doesn't seems good to you, because you are already happy with someone else, but be realistic.)

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What Girls & Guys Said

13
  • No way in hell, can you say you have a boyfriend with out hurting him, it's like your current boyfriend telling you that he has been secretly dating you while being in another relationship, how in the hell can he tell you something like that with out hurting you? I know it sounds a bit extreme, but it's a way of putting you in your guy friends shoes.

    You gotta tell him and just see how he reacts to it, no other way. In most cases, I think he'd be more upset with himself then you.

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  • wow that is a pretty bad situation for him.. he probably fell for you but didn't have the balls to make a move on it. I'd straight up tell him there's someone else you're with since he's gonna be hurt regardless but the sooner you tell him the faster he'll get over you

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  • Just tell him. He'll be upset but the only person he should be upset with is himself.

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  • Just say you met someone else. He will get over it in due time. Just be honest with him.

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