How do we "get to know each other"

Whenever I get a girls number, I usually send her a text the next day or so just casually saying hi, making small talk for a bit and then I ask her if I could take her out over the weekend. The past couple of girls that I have tried to date have all said something like "Well we should get to know each other first".

Ladies, I would love to know how to go about this. Does this mean we should find out more about each other over text, or maybe on the phone? I always assumed that the first date was the "get to know you" type of thing.


Most Helpful Girl

  • It can be over text or over the phone. It depends on the girl.

    Some girls are more cautious about going out with a guy until they know more about the person who asked them. It is a safety measure, since you really don't always know who you are meeting or getting involved with.

    Give it a little time and get to know at least the basics before you ask them out. It will also give you things to talk about when you do go out! It can also build attraction and anticipation for the first date, because you will begin to see all of the things you have in common and both of you can become more and more excited about each other. It is a good thing for you too! I think your straightforwardness is very admirable though. It may be good to wait, but on the other side of the coin you can wait too long, to where the girl loses interest. I doubt you will have that problem! :) Good luck!

    • Thank you, that helps out a lot.

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What Girls Said 1

  • From what you've said it sounds like the girls want to get to know you more over the phone or through text messaging (I suggest the former, since it provides more space to explain yourself and you opinions). If you really want a face to face encounter, though, I suggest you invite them to a party, or a dinner with friends. That way, it won't exactly be a date, and you can get to know each other more.

    This is what my current boyfriend did. First time we met, I had a party and one of my friends invited him to tag along. Then, he had a barbecue the next week and asked his friend to tell me I was invited. Then he asked for my number and invited me out with his friends till we got closer and I felt comfortable being alone with him when he asked me out.


What Guys Said 1

  • You bang her! That's what I do.

    • I'm trying to date man, I'm past the whole f*** buddy stage.

    • Show All
    • Somewhat. Even if I tried that method they still want to get to know me before even meeting up. This is like the 4th girl that has said that lol

    • Yeah chicks are all like that. So just listen for a bit, then bang her.