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I believe you need a balance of both. But I'm definitely leaning towards being wanted. Just because someone needs you doesn't mean that they want you around. Matter of fact needing something, doesn't really require much of a choice on your hand. But when someone wants you, then they are making a conscious choice of wanting you to be apart of their life.
---- NEEDED ---If I'm dependent upon you, that may not be my choice. I could despise the fact that I'm dependent upon you (especially if you mistreated me) and even despise you as a person because I'm so bitter about being dependent upon you. The reason I'm nice you/with you is because I literally can't survive without you. Long story, it's in my best interest to be with you because you give me things I need, things I may not be able to obtain elsewhere. My motivation is mostly (if not 100%) selfish.Because I need you, I'll (be willing to) do things that no normal/decent human being would be willing to do. This includes positive things, like make you breakfast, give you a ride when your car breaks down, give you a gift on your birthday and be there for you when you're sad/upset. This also includes negative things like emotionally abuse you to make you more dependent upon me (thereby increasing the likelihood that you'll never leave me and I'll never be without the things you give me that I need), kidnapping you, harassing/committing acts of violence against people I think you may have an interest in that aren't me, basically doing whatever I have to in order to ensure that I will never be without what I need (you).If I NEED you, this means I cannot survive without you. There is ZERO decision-making process here. If you leave/die/disappear, I will literally be unable to survive without you. Loss of general wellbeing, death and suicide are on the docket if I lose you. Therefore, in order to ensure my own survival, I will do whatever I have to (good and/or bad) to keep you, even if I despise you more than anyone else on the planet. Not exactly the material of healthy relationships/romance novels, is it?--- WANTED --- (The option I chose)I want you because I looked at you, got to know you, decided you were a good/compatible/respectable person and made the DECISION to be with you. I made a choice, and that choice was YOU. If you died tomorrow, I would be devastated. I'd probably go into a state of depression of an extended period, then get over it and proceed to live healthy life remembering you. I'm with you because I chose to be, because I looked at others and decided they weren't as good as you. If someone asked me who would you like to be locked up with for the next 48 hours, you'd be at/near the top of my list.Long story short, I'm with you because I want to be, not because someone locked me in a room with you and lost the key.
If you simply need a partner you are more likely to accept anyone. If you want someone it shows you have higher standards.Example: I need air. I will accept any air if I haven't been breathing for a few minutes.I want good coffee, I will only drink good coffee.
in my mind it starts with being wanted and becomes being needed after some time so it´s kind of the same.
I would never want to be needed by a guy. Would make me feel like they are too needy and all up in my sh*t and if I wanted to leave thy might kill themsleves eeekk
Needed. Being wanted is empty since things like that fade.
I woud prefer to ve needed.
Someone needing me sounds like an obsession.
It's better to be wanted.
It's better to be needed
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