Should I worry about my boyfriend talking to his ex?

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 9 months. My problem is that he still talks to his ex over Facebook. I'm also sure that they still text and email each other, too, even though I don't want to go through his phone to check. He also brings her up in conversation a lot.

Every time I talk to him about it he tells me that they are just really good friends and since they were together for a long time (3 1/2 years) and lived together, they have a lot of memories together. However, I don't really see it that way. I believe that ex's are ex's for a reason... the relationship didn't work out. My boyfriend says that he believes that, too, but I don't know. I mean, I don't ever talk about my ex's even though my boyfriend asks me about them sometimes. He says that past relationships are a part of what makes us, and talking about them to each other helps us understand one another better. He does have a good point, but it still makes me uncomfortable when he talks about her and talks to her on the internet.

Should I be worried if he still talks to his ex every couple of days? Sometimes I feel like he would take her back if she asked him to. I mean he's told me so much about her that I feel like I'm reading her biography sometimes. I even know about her family. I just want to talk to him about it, but I don't exactly know how to start.


Most Helpful Girl

  • going to be should b worried...not jealous worry..but he still is not over her! he loves you but there's something that makes him keep calling her..its good to forgive and move on..theres no need to keep talking every couple of days... I think you know 2 much about her..and that was his mistake... a part of him misses her and what they had. I believe you should b honest with yourself and face him...tell him that you know he's still not over her..cuz if he was you wouldn't b talking to her all the time... b honest with him...


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  • wow this is so strange its like I could have wrote that!

    i'm in the same situation myself I've been with my boyfriend for just over 9 months and he is best mates with his ex which would normally have never bothered me untill he started lieing to me about her saying he was going somewhere then spending the day with her.

    i got so parinoid about it that it started to effect the relationship it still dose as he still keeps things from me but I'm dealing with that

    for your sake you need to talk to your boyfriend about this as it won't go away on it's own.

    good luck

  • I personally would not allow that. He is dating you, not her any longer. She is an ex for a reason and he should have enough respect for you not to have contact with her. Another thing to look at is when he talks about her does he say good or bad things about her? I dated a guy who always brought his ex up and I just asked him if he wanted to be with her or not, when he said no I said then stop bringing her up please.