There seems to be a kind of loneliness epidemic going on. I read a lot about people who want to find a partner, want to have a fulfilling and lasting relationship, but for some reason can't. And as a result are forced to be lonely for extended periods of time.
Have you ever been lonely? For how long? Why do you think you had to experience this? And, most importantly, what have you learned from this experience?
Most Helpful Girl
I've been single for five years. I wasn't lonely all throughout the years but at times, sometimes frequent and sometimes not, a deep sense of loneliness and sadness would hit me. Usually right before bed or when I see a bond I don't have. One of the reasons I don't like romance shows is because of this. Because after watching them, they leave me yearning for something I don't have. The reason why I feel like this is maybe because, I went through something bad before and it made it hard for me to trust people. I have close childhood friends that you can count on one hand, they're dependable and understanding but I have never been the type of person who is expressive. I don't know how to be. So because of that, I tend to feel lonely with all these thoughts. People always told me, "I wish I could be you. You lasted so long without a partner." I get asked a lot, "Aren't you lonely?" And because of my pride, I always answered, "No. I'm used to this." But despite feeling that horrible loneliness in my heart, I learned a lot about myself. I started observing. And witnessing the problems, headaches and heartaches of people with partners around me, I told myself so many times, "I'm so lucky to be alone." Being lonely, sometimes allows you to hear what's not being said. The small actions of people, the change in someone's vibe etc. I think being lonely makes you more aware. There are more things to say but I think I should just end this long ass paragraph here.4
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Most Helpful Guy
Loneliness I believe has nothing to do with “being alone” or seclusion, as often people in very crowded cities, with roommates, etc say it is “lonely.” So it really isn’t about being alone, what it is, is two intersection feelings about oneself, that meet together (1) is self-loathing, doubting yourself or feeling “not good enough” or dwelling on things not going as planned let’s say and (2) the desire to feeling wanted, appreciated and loved.
When those two come together, run concurrently, or intersect in some way, which usually happen when you are alone thinking by coincidence, then you feel lonely. If you don’t want to feel lonely, you can work on either of those, work on being content, less critical of yourself and compassionate to yourself, as far as feeling wanted, you have to fix 1 first, then you appreciate others first, then it comes back around1
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