How to deal with the feeling of not being good enough after unrequited love?

Confessed to a friend, says she doesn’t like me in that way and simultaneously found out who she dated a year ago, was some tall white guy, now I’m sitting here comparing myself and feeling worthless.

Have the urge to change myself, I’m a regular guy, I guess that guy was super outdoorsy and stuff. I’m an introvert, I like what I like doing but maybe I’m not that exciting and I should change myself for her or other girls?

I’m also trying to stay friends but that is probably not a good idea right?

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What Girls Said 2

  • When I was like 14, I had a crush on this guy. I was not popular or good looking my any means, I had acne and dark under eye circles, weird frizzy hair and hated my appearance. My crush told me to my face “I’d rather kill myself than go out with you.”

    Then when I was 15 my next crush said, “Meh, I don’t really like her. I prefer (my best friend) over her.”

    Shit ruined my confidence so I decided to never tell anyone who I had a crush on and keep it all to myself.

    When I started college at 16 I found it so weird because so many guys were flocking to me and I had never dealt with so much attention. by the way the college I went to I didn’t know anyone.

    So believe me, just because someone doesn’t like you does not mean no one will. My confidence and self esteem is still fractured by those incidents when I was younger. But I learnt that some could actually find me attractive.

    IN SUMMARY: you will find a girl that loves you as much as you love her, don’t feel worthless you cannot control how others perceive you.

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  • Keep telling yourself that you deserve it which you do by fact but you will manipulate yourself to believe it.

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    • 5d

      Deserve to be worthless?

    • 5d

      No the opposite you deserve love and respect

What Guys Said 2

  • I've been there, I know how you feel. You can't someone you like like you back. I mean it is technically possible but it could take a long time, like years, and that's if you spend a lot of time with them and they may change their mind one day, but it's unlikely if they don't like spending so much time with you to begin with.

    Take it from me who's been around the block a long time, you could change a few things about yourself, as in improve some things about yourself, but you can't change who you are as a whole, nor should you ever need to cuz someone you will meet someone who likes you for you.

    I know it sucks, but in the meantime, all you can do it suck it up and say "so my friend doesn't like me like I like her, oh well, maybe I'll have better luck next time with another girl." The key is to never give up, even when it seems like you may never win.

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  • If you know that you’re a good person, then that should be good enough. you can still be friends, but when she finds a new boyfriend , you will feel crushed again..

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