Have you thought about how you want to love and why you want to love that way?

I want to be your favorite hiding place... where you know you can turn and always feel safe and loved.

I cannot figure out why but I need to feel like my partner needs me. Have you thought about how you want to love and why you want to love that way?

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  • I feel the same way

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  • I want to fall into my girl, to be apart of her and melt into her. I want to just have a love like a brother and sister true love for each other and of course sex will be there but I really want to love deeply like that.

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  • I want to be accepted, touched. That's how I feel loved and good. Times I felt love for women, I wanted to touch and hold them. I think that is attachment... of which I at times had a disorder related to... wanting to be close, but not wanting it as well. I relate that back to my being shy, but don't know where that came from.

    For you... I can only guess you want to be needed because younger, you felt that and didn't get it from parent, probably father. Like he didn't pay you the attention you wanted, pushed you away at times, or parents faught, so you are acting out of that void to have that hole filled... which cannot be by any human even if they can calculate logorithms in their head. But, they can help. It's an emotional void.

    Wild guess... something like that. We all at our core are love and want love... early childhood defines how we translate that... from a broken context.

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    • 3d

      You know, that's pretty spot on... When I was a teenager, my dad would always tell my sister that she was beautiful or how nice she looked, etc. He never really said anything to me, ever. So I remember hearing him tell her that and then waiting... and wondering what was wrong with me and why my dad didn't tell me I was pretty.
      I found out years later that my parents were concerned about a phase she was going through and thought she needed some extra validation from him. I percieved it as I wasn't good enough or didn't compare but in reality, they were just trying to build her up.

    • 3d

      :)! That's awsome you got that input to make sense out of it, imagine the young girls who never get that and are lost and have to make it up. The emotional imprint of that wound is still there in charge... how you received and processed that feeling, but you intellectually know the truth of it to regain control.
      Nothing wrong with wanting to be needed, but I think there is always better emotional health the problem being... if he ever slacks... and doesn't express his need for you when you are in that moment, that old emotion kicks in and speaks lies to you... "he doesn't love me..." you feel... rejection, or not desire, and that causes downward spiral if not caught... like if he's having a bad moment and can't recover it. So I think helps to understand your emotion, and even better to heal it up so one doesn't react at those times. If you have anything from dad you can feed into that to speak truth to it, that helps. There's other techniques to get your mind above it. Those emotions resonate in the body, they need released there too.

      Yea... damn, I'm getting good at this... toot toot my horn! I need to open a practice...
      It's not so complex anymore... we make sense. it's easier to see someone elses stuff than my own... that's why there are psychologists for psychologists:)

  • I want to be that person that will always cherish and support her not matter what, be happy with her when things go well and grieve with her when things go badly.

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  • Because we all have that feeling of being wanted , we want someone to love us the way we love them , it makes us feel safe in secure in out relationships considering all. the negative things we are surrounded by in this world so finding someone that loves us and wants us the same feels safe for us

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  • Simple

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  • Yes, I want that. Both ways. Not right now. Need to heal up.

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  • I can't really control that stuff. If you can, please tell me how.

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  • I haven't really thought about it. I figured that things will happen when they do. Just follow my heart. I don't see any way on planning how to love or even who you love.

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  • Of the five love languages, I care most about quality time followed directly by physical touch. Next comes words of affirmation. I care less about acts of service and least about gifts.

    I try to incorporate those top 4 for showing my love as well. I make time and plan fun things for that time. I love hugging and kissing and just showing love through touch (and sex, but that's not the main point of the love language I think). I am bad at giving compliments, but I try to make them count when I do. I try to show I care by doing small considerate things, like cooking an awesome meal. I tend to only give gifts when it's demanded, like on birthdays, because I don't really like receiving them much and never know what to give anyways.

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  • I don't know. I want it to be close and last the rest of my life. Because I want it to. I don't know why, exactly.

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  • As long as I can feel at least useful to her, I’m good to go. Anything else is just gravy.

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  • This is something I think about often.

    I've loved a few women in my time and I suspect I'll come to love more. In all this time of learning, I've come closer and closer to how I want to love and expressing what I want through love by giving back in return.

    At this point, I want warmth and deep emotional connection. I want to hold my head against hers, our eyes closed and us waiting in our silence before we open our eyes to a smile.

    Of course, this is only part of how I love, but when I do, I love deeply. It has a tendency to hurt, but I'll meet someone willing to share that as much as I would for her.

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  • I have for the last 27 years, I have craved that for the last 27 years.

    seems elusive to me

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  • I kinda love the Bonnie and Clyde, Me and you against the world attitude! By that I mean just finding someone that through any circumstances whilst we're together we're winning lol

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  • Not really. I haven't been in a relationship before.

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  • Well you know, I've thought about it and thought why should I try seeking it right now.

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  • just meet some 1 to settle with that feels that other half of you

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  • I have not thought of it this way before. But I really like this

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  • I'd have to agree with that even if it was hard for me to show it.

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  • Not really to be honest

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  • it's nice to need and feel needed in return

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  • Like a family

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  • Yeah I don't want to

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  • Yes I have

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