Do you think he lead me on, or was it all just in my head?

i really liked this guy who used to come in all the time, before he would come in, order and go upstairs for a long time. Then after a drew a smiley face on his coffee lid, he talked to me more, told me basic facts about him, how he loves to cook, cooks for himself, brings his own lunch, has a dog etc. And i noticed he stopped going upstairs and would wait and talk with me until his food was done. He would always just seem really happy and i genuinely thought there was something happening. Anyway last week he came in with a coworker and his coworker asked if he wanted the same thing i felt pretty comfortable and friendly and didn't think there was any harm so i sarcastically said "hes pretty consistent" and it was all friendliness, and when they left he smiled at me. Anyway he didn't come in for a week and just Monday he came in with a different coworker and looked so serious, didn't smile at me once and just wasn't friendly and chatty like before, and just looked at me with this blank expression. Even his coworker looked serious, anyway he pretty much told me he went to starbucks and his girlfriend treated him... i felt so sad and confused like wtf he never mentioned he had one, i felt like he had so many opportunities to mention her but he didn't, and just on Monday he came in again and didn't even look straight ahead, like wow what did i even do, so do you think he was leading me on/flirting with me? Or did i just read too much into every little thing? Im pretty crushed over the situation, but of course im backing off now and not going to dwell about it but i just feel so played and not sure what happened and why he decided to tell me now.. pls help.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I know it's hard but the next time he comes in (whether he's alone or with someone else), I'd just casually say something like: "Hey, I just wanted to let you know that there was one time you came in and I made a joke but after I said it, I realized it might have sounded kind of like sarcastic but it really wasn't. And I noticed you didn't seem as happy after that. I'm sure you've probably forgotten about it but I just wanted you to know."

    You'll feel so much better after you've said it !!

    I'm only speculating but;
    he may have had someone else in his life who would come across as sarcastic and it was just a bad reminder. It might explain why he didn't seem happy when he came in with a coworker (the first time). His coworker may have insisted on going even though he didn't want to.
    He may have mentioned a girlfriend to let you know he's "moved on". He may not even have a girlfriend. ;)

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Most Helpful Guy

  • How about you please help us by not having all your words smashed together in one giant glob?

    I don't think he was purposely leading you on just to trick you. I think he was just being very friendly and had no intention of taking things further. However, if he breaks up with his girlfriend, you may have a good chance of developing something with him.

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What Girls & Guys Said

23
  • He did lead you on, but I´m not sure it was intentional.

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    • 7 d ago

      What do you mean? He must of known i was into him, i thought the smiley face gave it away.

    • 7 d ago

      Not necessarily. Guys are often a bit dense when it comes to subtle flirting.

  • All in your head you women tend to overthink everything I bet this ain't even how it actually happened but how it happened in your head

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    • 7 d ago

      No, everything happened the way it happened like i described it, but the part of us getting together was all in my head. :(

    • 7 d ago

      Yeah you made a mistake it happens seems like you want to blame the guy but in the end its your fault so just learn from it

  • If you think he did something, he likely did

    TRUST YOUR INSTINCT

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  • He was leading you on

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    • 7 d ago

      Why would he do that when he has a girlfriend... and act cold towards me like i did something wrong

    • 7 d ago

      Ask him

    • 7 d ago

      I wouldn't know to.. im not good at these things

  • yeah, looks like you say something that wasn't there

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