Is my husband in love/attracted to his mom?

My husband is obsessed with his mom. When we first started dating, he was living with her.. at 40 years old. After we were married we were both living with her, although he promised we would live on the boat (as we run a sailing charter business). Finally, this year we are living on the boat.

But, we might as well be living with his mom as they are texting from the second they’re both awake until the second they’re both asleep. Yet, we live on the same island. She calls at least 6 times a day, sometimes more, and repeatedly if the call goes unanswered. If my husband doesn’t answer the phone she texts me to tell him to answer her.

On top of the constant contact, my husband cannot make a decision without consulting his mom first, even if it has nothing to do with her. He tries to have me make decisions for him sometimes, but I try to encourage him to make his own decisions because he’s a grown man. But I find myself taking the place of his mom on numerous occasions.

He also finds any excuse to start talking about his mom when in a social situation (especially when he’s drinking). He has even said things like “my mom looks great for her age” and asks his friends “how old do you think my mom is?” As if they’re going to hit on a 75 year old woman.

One of his friends confided in me last year saying that he was concerned over my husband’s attachment to his mother. Another one of his friends said to me “he’ll never listen to you over his mom.”Another one said “she must not be the easiest mother in-law to deal with.” So, I’m not the only one who thinks their relationship is odd.

She has also been extremely rude to me on a number of occasions. She treats me like I am their slave to run the business, and expects me to do all the work, which I do, without pay. My husband doesn’t treat me this way, but he doesn’t empathize with me over the way his mom treats me nor does he stick up for me.

Is this a normal mother-son relationship, slightly abnormal, or should I be concerned?
Is my husband in love/attracted to his mom?
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