Just a few minutes ago I read old text messages from the year my ex left me for another girl. The entire experience gave me severe trust issues because during the end of our relationship (the last few months) he made it seem like he wanted to work things out and be together. I had left him for my own peace of mind because he was hurting me, but he chose to ask to get back together. from that day forward up until the very last time I saw him he had consistently maintained (verbally) that he wanted us to be back together -right before he stopped speaking to me altogether. There is no denying that they definitely hurt me. But eventually I saw evidence that he left me for another girl which filled the blank in my mind for closure. Despite how strongly he had tried to convince me that he wanted to get back together before he disappeared, it became apparent that he left to peruse a relationship with this girl. But the messages between me and my friend contradicted what I had found out. I’m not saying I made an inaccurate assumption because he definitely did lie to me for a long time about a lot, but it’s just a little less likely that he actually left me for her because during the times where I would text my friend about things that had happened around the end of our relationship it seemed that she was probably single during that time. There is a chance that she and him could have had something going on in secrecy months earlier than the day the evidence was shown to me but it seems less likely. But basically, because I came to believe that the extent of his disrespect for me was so high, I actually never could find it in me to let go of my trust issues. A while ago I even saw him at a store and I walked away without a word even after me and him had locked eyes. I didn’t know how to confront him because it seemed like he was probably a narcissist. But if my timelines are wrong then it seems like I might be mad/hurt about things that didn’t actually happen. Maybe anyway.