How does this short story sound? Should I give it to my fiancée to read?

How does this short story sound? Should I give it to my fiancée to read?
It's a short story I've been writing in the past days.
Story summary - a small caravan is traveling through the desert. Caravan is made of a woman, a man, a servant and their two camels. They are smuggling opium, which is illegal and punished with death by royal decree.
Along their path they run into a royal patrol. The patrol officer smells the opium, but the woman says it's the servant fault so the soldiers take away the man to be executed.
The couple has some hidden opium left and they go on with their travel.
Along the road the couple fights because the man did not want to smuggle the drug but the woman insisted.
So when they run into another patrol, the woman tells the soldiers that the man spoke against the King, so they beat him up.
They resume traveling and run into another patrol. Here the man tells the soldiers that the woman plots to kill the King, so the soldiers take away the woman to execute the woman.
The man keeps on traveling, but just as he's arriving to the city gates, he gets assaulted and killed by highwaymen.
How does this short story sound? Should I give it to my fiancée to read?
2
3
Add Opinion