Is it wrong to expect the person you hurt or abused to just totally forget about what you done just because you apologized and they forgave you?

Question

Answer 1

Jean-Marie_Céline | 958 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Influencer

Yes.
I never forget the wrongs and abuse done to me, no matter how much she apologizes.

Answer 2

Anonymous

Not if they forgave you, no. It's not forgiveness if you keep bringing it up. It's acceptance, which is a completely different thing.

Asker

1 mo
But let’s say they hurt you physically and you really did forgive them but now they verbally attack, abuse and threaten you rather than physically, how can you forget about something, even when you have genuinely forgave them, when they haven’t really worked on changing seriously? even if they said they would.
Opinion Owner

1 mo
Then it's not really about what came before, is it? It's about what's happening right now and that's a completely different story. And if you're open to advice, I'd get the hell out of there immediately.
Asker

1 mo
It’s hard to. Well not necessarily hard but it confuses me because one minute he’s calm and genuine and sweet and the next he’s threatening to slap me or hit me because he has started to yell at me, get in my face, make threatening hand gestures and when I stick up for myself and yell back he feels I’m being disrespectful and that’s when the threats come, before he’ll just right away hit me now it’s just “I’m proud of myself for my slapping the crap out of you.” In other words when it doesn’t matter because when you say something like that that means it’s still in you to want to hit me.
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Opinion Owner

1 mo
That's how abusers work. They all do it. It's a form of manipulation to keep you there. Don't fall for it. The abuse will not stop. You have to leave.

Answer 3

Asker

But let’s say they hurt you physically and you really did forgive them but now they verbally attack, abuse and threaten you rather than physically, how can you forget about something, even when you have genuinely forgave them, when they haven’t really worked on changing seriously? even if they said they would.

Answer 4

Opinion Owner

Then it's not really about what came before, is it? It's about what's happening right now and that's a completely different story. And if you're open to advice, I'd get the hell out of there immediately.

Answer 5

Asker

It’s hard to. Well not necessarily hard but it confuses me because one minute he’s calm and genuine and sweet and the next he’s threatening to slap me or hit me because he has started to yell at me, get in my face, make threatening hand gestures and when I stick up for myself and yell back he feels I’m being disrespectful and that’s when the threats come, before he’ll just right away hit me now it’s just “I’m proud of myself for my slapping the crap out of you.” In other words when it doesn’t matter because when you say something like that that means it’s still in you to want to hit me.

Answer 6

Opinion Owner

That's how abusers work. They all do it. It's a form of manipulation to keep you there. Don't fall for it. The abuse will not stop. You have to leave.

Answer 7

jahaims | 288 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Explorer

It depends on if they knew what they were doing when they did it. If they had a bad habit like name calling and then they fixed it and didn't repeat the action I think forgiveness is a good thing

Answer 8

kkirk4442 | 123 opinions shared on Relationships topic.

Xper 7

Hurt can still remain, even after an apology.

Answer 9

Anonymous

No and I forgave him because I love him

Is it wrong to expect the person you hurt or abused to just totally forget about what you done just because you apologized and they forgave you?

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