Why it is fine to hate your father, but not your mother?

[Miristheiss]

Hate might be too strong a word but it is equally understandable and permissible for a child to have strong issues against either a father or a mother.

Just their born with sex has absolutely zero bearing on that.

If someone implies it should than they are a fool.

It was probably sex related. Women probably got offended if you had an issue with your mom. Kind of a "women gotta stick together thing" Also you are a man. That probably plays into it. If it was a girl having an issue with her mom..."women gotta stick together" isn't in play... all the parties are women... but a boy having issue with is mom
"women gotta stick together" kicks in and you... the male are the enemy... the ever virtuous woman is the hero... she must be understood and empathized with.

It is foolishness. you can have issues with either parent. Anyone who says otherwise is just being illogical and has no sound basis to stand on.

You have been posting about her for over a year now.
How does this play out? Do you still live with her? Otherwise, if you have such issues with her... why don't you just make a clean break... you are an adult... each of you just go your separate ways. Why is this still such an ongoing issue?

I remember what her offenses are... I think I'd just disown my mom and cut her out of my life... but I have strong opinions about that kind of subject...

[DeathJack]

I never properly got to know / remember my father, he died when I was 9, however. I will always hate my mother. The bullshit, the years of abuse, neglect, the lying and the mental manipulation she still puts on me now. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. That woman is wrong, in a million different ways.


There is a double standard, but that’s because people have their own opinions and how sacred a mother is.

[Mia-Wallace]

Men's image is being kind of distorted for a few decades, especially as father figues. The same isn't happening to women and mothers.

It's kind of expected when people think a father is bad by default unless he proves himself a good father, and a mother is good and can't be bad whatever she does.

A lot of women also blindly support other women in the name of empowerment. Maybe it's just in-group bias. 🤷‍♀️

Me? I'd say hate whoever abused you. Whether it's healthy or not is another topic.

[MzAsh]

I can’t relate to people who say they hate their parents. I’ve seen (from my opinion) people hate their parents for the dumbest reasons, then those people go in to be the same kind of shitty parents they think their own parents were.

[Angelina25]

Who goes around spreading rumours lmao

[Account]

Because people have this stupid misconception in their heads that mothers can't do anything wrong and they love their children above everything, which in certain cases it is completely untrue.

People have the habit of judging based on their own surroundings/their own experiences and they find it incredibly difficult to put themselves in the other person's shoes, even if they fool themselves by thinking they can.

[Toast792]

Some people have had a great life with their parents, so they couldn't imagine having emotionally abusive ones. This goes for mothers especially, since usually moms are the 'kind ones' who are supposed to help you through the emotional shit, whereas fathers are usually known to be the 'tough love' parent. Also it's more common to have an abusive father than an abusive mother, so there are probably more people who can relate with you hating your father.

[JackSmy]

Guilt. She carried you for 9 months, and gained weight, and it hurt her back, and she walked uphill to school, both ways, in snow 3 feet deep, and whatever other GUILT she can heap on you!!
My mother is a MASTER of GUILT, and I no longer have any contact with her, because of it, and her verbally abusive ways!

[BeenThereLovedIt]

My wife's mother is a monster, and it's fine to hate her.

My mother was awesome, but my father was a giant asshole, so it's fine to hate him.

I never saw anyone say you can't hate a mother, but I will agree that society as a whole tends to over-worship them. I believe Bill Burr did a stand-up routine about it that pointed out the hypocrisies of that.

[IveGotNoName]

Hate is a very strong word. It's never "fine". Even if you have good reasoning behind it, it's not "fine". Not meaning that you aren't allowed to, just that it isn't "positive", and "fine" is a positive word.

Having said that there should definitely not have been a difference between the reactions you got.

[Kas19]

Funnily enough, I hated my mother... My step mother anyway. She forced me to call her my mother since "she was the only one I ever had." Since my mother killed herself a year after I was born. So I totally agree and you deserve empathy. I'm sorry you went through horrible shit with your mother. No child deserves that.

[Chris_here]

For me it is easier because my father hasn't been all that great, has swear at me before, call me bunch of names, even belittled me. My mother in the other hand is very supportive and caring, always ready to help out. I don't hate my father but I sure do hold resentment because of those things. And makes it easier to choose my mother everytime.

[pandyponde]

No idea.
I get lots of indian scammers try to tell me to make peace with my abusive mother. Earns a quick block.

[Bella9191]

No clue. But for someone who hates their mother I totally understand how frustrating this can be. I don’t ever even tell anyone I hate my mother because literally no one understands how a person can hate their mother,

[Anonymous]

It's probably that more people on GAG relate to having struggles with father than having struggles with mother

[Screenwriter]

Maybe the people who complained love their mothers and hate their fathers.
Both my parents were good people. I can't complain about either of them as parents.
These other folks seem to have issues.
That's all there is.

[EyebrowChewie]

Hating is just wrong, you should just forgive and move on. They are both at fault for whatever upbringing you didn't appreciate. And if they didn't have much then it's probably the fuel for the problems you experienced. Women give birth to all of us so there has to be some respect.

[Lyndsielee666]

I absolutely hate my mother. I wish more than anything she would go back into the hole she crawled out of and never try to be in my life again so I feel that friend. people will never fully understand what you go through so I wouldn’t let it effect you, especially on this website.

[TOTEMPLASTER]

Your father was stuck with the no-win job of disciplining your evil little ass while mommy got to play the guardian angle when retribution was due for your crimes.

[NewGlados]

It is not fine to hate your father. Otherway if you say you hate your hate mother, they give too negative reactions to you. People think all mothers are always angels. In Many cultures mothers are more precious. Generally people recognize importance of their father after a long time.

[anantmann]

some people do hate their mothers, dependent upon circumstances, sometimes parents failed to be parents at all, so this is not necessary that a father is the only one deserving hatred mothers can also be responsible for poor parenting after all we are humans

[NamerOfStars]

Empathy vs Respect. It explains 90% of the differences in how we (both as a society and as individuals) treat men and women. 95% of the rest is some combination of lust and jealousy.

[abfabvictoria]

I don’t like my mother, but I loved my father. Not everyone is meant to be a parent. Love who you can while you can.

[FunTastyLady]

The way I see it if there is no "objective" reason to hate your father - neither should be acceptable.

[AdithyaR]

Probably because mothers tend to have this image of being loving and caring and people are unwilling to see this image being broken.
People forget that either parent can be toxic.

[Anonymous]

Are u kidding me? Eminem made a career out of hating on his mom😂

[JosyJosy]

I only think it's fine/normal if they've been abusive or something. No matter who it is, father or mother

[Anonymous]

I don’t think that is true, women are blamed for all sort of things.

Anyway I think it would help to talk with a therapist about it all, it helps to have someone objective and professionnal to talk things through with.

[collie22]

This is double standard , if you ask me we should forgive our parents for there short comings and be happy they brought us into this world. But be careful do let them hurt you again.

[SphynxUK]

You can hate any parent you wish to. It’s not our business, and you have your own reasons.
I don’t even hate one of my parents. I’ve just papered over them, and I continue my life. It’s too much effort to hate someone that isn’t worth it.

[pleasestopthis]

It sucks to hate your own parents but you can hate any of them. No one should point fingers at you if they don't know what you went through

[_no_one_]

Man.

[Neal_Anblome]

It's not fine, we just live in a society with retarded man-hating trends, and plenty of idiots believe that's okay

[Aiko_E_Lara]

The "women are wonderful effect" is actually true. And that effect is on those people

[Xnnnttrzzs]

It's easy when dad's been at the gas station for 20 years

[Teenybop]

It isn’t. I think you need to work on your issues without bringing everyone else down.

[Tel86]

It's abit backwards for me. My mum chose a druggy over my dad & i tried 2 help her & she went back 2 her druggy boyfriend. So now I don't talk 2 her

[msc545]

Men, even fathers, apparently have no value. Women do.

[CalmYourTits]

Well they have been working on indoctrinating people to hate men for years.

[DeeDeeDeVour]

Even if you have valid reasons to, it's best not to hate since hate consumes you.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

You shouldn't hate your parents. You're supposed to respect your parents.

[DJB72]

I'd have to say hate is never a positive thing.

[gooselover]

I hate my schizo mother. So far, so good.

[Agape93]

It’s fine to hate both

[Iron_Man]

I don’t hate my parents Love them with a passion

[ThisIsMyOpinion]

Oh it is fine. 100% fine!

[Gedaria]

Father's are easier to hate..

[Thedivinechic]

You're allowed to dislike whomever...

[Submissivenerd]

That’s just the polarised nature of social media.

[CriticalDiscourse]

Jokes on you, I do hate my mom.

[Anonymous]

i hate my dad with all my guts so ur not alone.

[Ally247]

mothers birth you

[Skaterboi2]

And who says that’s fine?

[123lucy]

I did not know that was a thing, so I don't know.

[psychoticanimaIIover]

Sexism and stuff.

[Anonymous]

Cus whamen has golden vagina

[mydisgustingfather]

No such thing

[happyness28]

Marketing

[emiliadavid]

Who hate s father?