Should I just back off from her life and keep living my own life? It's gotten out of control.

Iskhandar
Hi everyone, This is actually my first question around here and it's a pretty serious one. I'm sorry to bring this out on all of you but I'm sure there's someone around that may have the answer I've been looking for ever so painfully.

You see, I have been in a very serious relationship for the last two years and 8 months. Everything was going fine, we loved each other, a love I've never known my whole life. We traveled the world together, we lived together, I have never been so happy. We fell in love for one another after the first date! And been together ever since.

Problem is, in the past six months, she fell into depression, I guess the stress caught up to her in the end. She started to grow distant, but I'm positive she never cheated, and neither did I. The love is still there, it's just she's afraid of showing and feeling it freely. Her parents separated when she was very young, and her father dissappeared for three years before coming back into her life, but he's more of a negative influence on her! He's a very manipulative person and he uses this depression to gain her love and trust, giving her the impression that she's very sick, though, in my opinion, he's the sick one. He doesn't want to lose this opportunity, being a psichiatrist, to be close to her but he's doing everything he can to stall her in this condition. The mother is a very material person, she's not at all very affectionate. So I've been the one person she's been clinging to these past years.

Now, in the past few months, she's started cutting everyone out except her dad. She fought with some of her best friends and drove them away or simply stopped talking to others. It's like now she's afraid to get better! She stays on the computer all day, except when she has to go to work, and it's really painful to see her this way.

Rock bottom was the other day, I was so tired and frustrated to fight this war alone with no allies that I lost control over things and told her I didn't love her anymore. I was lying. Now I hurt her, I tried to patch things up in a very discrete and sensitive way, but she says she doesn't feel she can't trust me anymore. I contacted all of her friends in secret because I felt that if she didn't want me there at least they could try harder to be with her and help her get through it. I tried talking to her after this all went down... she told me she was scared, she couldn't trust me, it really hurt, but truth is I made my bed with my decisions and now I must sleep in it.

I still love her, but I'll put myself aside since I don't think she really wanted to be with me anymore. But I'm still having doubts. She closed the door on me while crying, she still weared the "promise ring" on the finger when I went to see her, I'm really having a hard time seeing things clearly right now. Is it possible that in reality she wanted me to stay and tell her she was wrong? Am I still in time? or should I just back off from her life and keep living my own life..?
Should I just back off from her life and keep living my own life? It's gotten out of control.
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