Search Results: seeing my ex and his new girl

I would admit that I used to be quite clingy when I was younger because I thought love means that "the other person is your whole world". That idea eventually started to change after I was hurt by a few people. I started to feel like whatever's going to happen will happen, and that if a guy is going to cheat or lie, he is going to do so no matter how clingy you are or how much you check on him, so I gave up and just started having my own life, doing my own thing, and it seems like guys then actually try to get closer by themselves.

It is not "playing games" or "playing hard to get" because I genuinely do not want my life to evolve around another person. And I literally told my ex-boyfriends, "I'm not going to tell you what you can't do. You can do anything you want, you just have to take the consequences as well." What I found interesting is that in the past guys would try to make up things or avoid telling me what's actually going on, but when I didn't even ask, they would call to check in with me and they would try to get together with you any chances they could - one ex-boyfriend would pick me up from work every single day while another would commute 30 minutes to a place so he could walk with me to my next stop for 10-15 minutes.

This new guy whom I am now seeing seems to be the same. At first, he said he would call but didn't until the next week, it would take double time for him to reply my texts and his texts were always only half the length, and he would reply with one word or even one letter. I stopped replying because I saw no point to send messages if he ain't responding well. He then started calling on a regular basis, sending daily good morning texts, and making plans with me 3-5 days ahead of time.

It just does not make sense. What is it that attracts guys when the girl does not show that she cares as much (or what people call "less clingy")?

I know im not over thinking stuff but me & my ex dated 2 years ago. we only went on 5 dates but i know apparently he was in love with me & i really loved him too so much & cared. We didn't work out it was long distance relationship but everytime i tried to get back with him he would play games & never took me seriously. He would ignore me, make me feel dead & he knew he hurt me but kept doing it again, he would say sorry but break his promise. i wouldn't hear from him for 3 mths first then he will come back for abit then be gone for another 4 mths. when i was depressed, hurt he would act happy & distant, ignore me, make me feel like im not worth it & rub other girls in my face. I never ignored him before i was always respectful so he did it first. He played mind games. Also on fb he would disrespect women calling them bitches/hoes i knew he meant me as well. He never really thanked me for anything i did for him & just lied.

So when i had enough & was really done with his bs, manipulations he would beg me several times to take him back. i almost did but my parents, friends were all pissed off & told me not too. it can get worse & he sounds abusive. I knew they were right for once because i had a bad feeling he would hurt me again & break promises so i decided not too. He even said how he would meet my parents & talk to him. Then he would look for other girls & if they dont work out he thinks he has control of me still. so when i told him we both tried to work it out but its not working, no matter how hard it is we need to move on. he started to creep me out. this was last year in April & he said if he lost me he would do something crazy go to jail, hospital, etc. he would get into fights with guys & show pics of his bloody fists on fb to show off.

i lost all my trust in him. what i noticed is he got his 2 friends to keep talking to me, harassing me, seeing whats new? if they feel i have a new crush on a guy & am happy they keep msging me.